Is fighting ALOT healthy in a r/ship?

[bevanluv]

Hi all. I'm hopeing someone can help me out here... as some of you are aware i have been with my guy for 4 months and we r living together. He is a great guy and all but we fight every second day almost.. always about or somthing else trivial... i've put it down to the fact that we both are strong minded or in other words stubborn and wont let anything rest. Latley i've found my self asking 'is it really worth it?' like i'm not happy and thats not good.. i dont think i should be have second thoughts about my r/ship... but than agian.. all r/ships have there ups and downs right? But are they as frequent as every second day? And if it is what r others fighting over?

Any ideas on this subject would be very helpful, thanks guys! :confused:

[eightball61]

all r/ships have there ups and downs right? But are they as frequent as every second day? And if it is what r others fighting over?



All relationship are not perfect and you see that. It's not healthy though to fight with your partner every day(especialy being together for only 4 months). Fights generally help to create an understanding of each partners' differences but when it happens all the time it shows you both are just way to different.

You both need to come to an understanding of each other. If you both can't work out these kinks then it's going to be hard to work out the relationship. You need to give some serious thought to this. You have only been with this guy for 4 months.........Now, try to imagine being married like this for 40 years!!!! Do you think you'll be happy?

[ivy]

Hi all. I'm hopeing someone can help me out here... as some of you are aware i have been with my guy for 4 months and we r living together. He is a great guy and all but we fight every second day almost.. always about or somthing else trivial... i've put it down to the fact that we both are strong minded or in other words stubborn and wont let anything rest. Latley i've found my self asking 'is it really worth it?' like i'm not happy and thats not good.. i dont think i should be have second thoughts about my r/ship... but than agian.. all r/ships have there ups and downs right? But are they as frequent as every second day? And if it is what r others fighting over?

Any ideas on this subject would be very helpful, thanks guys! :confused:


Well I can think of a couple of ideas, learn to communicate without it breaking out into a fight. Listen to each other and don't interrupt. If one of you is getting to angry, stop and take a walk or something. Take the time to cool down.
When 2 people move in together it takes awhile sometimes to get use to each others habits. My husband and I had many many disagreements the first few years of our marriage. We had to learn to fight fare. We had to learn to listen and make sure we understood each other, by literally repeating back to each other what the other said and how we took it, to make sure we really understood each other. Communicate and don't put the other one down.....

Let me just say love is an action word, you choose to love and you take action on that by actively working towards solutions to your conflicts for one. If we let our hearts lead us then we will be disappointed. I "felt" like leaving my marriage more then a few times in the beginning, but chose to hang in there and work through the problems.

Living together is much different then dating. In the end if you love each other you will grow stronger together working through the difficult times. I would be interested why you argue about . Is it about not enough or about performance? Anyway if you are both on the same page and want to work it out, start now.

If you can not talk to each other then you have big problems. Talk about your problems when you are not angry. Set a time to do that. Say I want to talk about this but think we should agree to set a time to do this when we have cooled down... You both have to want to work it out. Being stubborn is the death of a good relationship, let go of the pride. I wish you the best of luck!!

[Diablo]

Congrastulations on your forthcoming marriage. J/K. Do y'all stay mad after a fight? If not, then y'all could work things out in the long run. You haven't been with him all that long, so some issues will have to be resolved before you go a long time without a fight. If neither of you are mad five minutes after a fight, then it should work out over the long run. Hell, my downstairs neighbor and I aren't even dating and sometimes the neighbors can hear us yelling at each other.

[Howard]

Not all fighting in a relationship is bad not if its done in a comedic way.You just have to learn to understand one another & to communicate well. :)

[MDeezy]

I think there will be a time when we all second guess our relationships but to continue on and want to work thru it is the key.

Fighting in a relationship is healthy in certain dossages. If you guys fight everyday over small things as you stated, then its an obvious red flag that this may not be the relationship for you, or maybe you guys rushed into moving in together. If you guys definately want to try and work it out, maybe not living together for a while can help.


On a side note, its true what they say about Make up ;)

[Howard]

I think there will be a time when we all second guess our relationships but to continue on and want to work thru it is the key.

Fighting in a relationship is healthy in certain dossages. If you guys fight everyday over small things as you stated, then its an obvious red flag that this may not be the relationship for you, or maybe you guys rushed into moving in together. If you guys definately want to try and work it out, maybe not living together for a while can help.


On a side note, its true what they say about Make up ;)

Once you have the make up you forget what you've fought about.

[MDeezy]

Amen to that. Plus then you guys realize how minimal the fight was in the first place.

[Howard]

Amen to that. Plus then you guys realize how minimal the fight was in the first place.


Is there such thing as make up foreplay,Deezy? :D

[MDeezy]

Dont know but I'll certainly give it a try and find out next time ;)

[2BDMD]

Hi all. I'm hopeing someone can help me out here... as some of you are aware i have been with my guy for 4 months and we r living together. He is a great guy and all but we fight every second day almost.. always about or somthing else trivial... i've put it down to the fact that we both are strong minded or in other words stubborn and wont let anything rest. Latley i've found my self asking 'is it really worth it?' like i'm not happy and thats not good.. i dont think i should be have second thoughts about my r/ship... but than agian.. all r/ships have there ups and downs right? But are they as frequent as every second day? And if it is what r others fighting over?

Any ideas on this subject would be very helpful, thanks guys! :confused:
I recently just got out of a relationship that has this characteristic. We dated for 6 months or so and broke up 8 times! We fought like once a week about something different most of the time.

I finally said, I had enough, we're done and I'm so relieved. Can't wait to meet and date another woman that I can get along with.

The was amazing, at times, I believe that was the only thing that kept me longing for my ex. God, I'm glad we're done! Fighting all the time definitely is a warning for a uncompatible relationship.

[Howard]

Dont know but I'll certainly give it a try and find out next time ;)



Hi Deezy.Why have to make up after fighting?
What does that solve? :confused:

[Howard]

Sometimes fighting in relationships solves problems.

[MDeezy]

Hi Deezy.Why have to make up after fighting?
What does that solve? :confused:

No it doesnt have to be had, just if that happens after a n argument/fight some how its implified. I would hear about it a lot plus that seinfield episode and didnt think much about it. After reading this thread and I reflected back, when my gf and I made love that night or at some point that same day, it just had some extra flavor to it, I cant describe how.

But it doesnt have to be had, if it happens its a lovely thing.

[Howard]

No it doesnt have to be had, just if that happens after a n argument/fight some how its implified. I would hear about it a lot plus that seinfield episode and didnt think much about it. After reading this thread and I reflected back, when my gf and I made love that night or at some point that same day, it just had some extra flavor to it, I cant describe how.

But it doesnt have to be had, if it happens its a lovely thing.



You Know Deezy,I think I'm going to try it with my girlfriend Robin.When we fight,we'll have some foreplay to take our minds away from the arguements. :D