Overreacting?

[Anon1234]

Hi All....

me and my g/f been going out now for around 9months, we been really good together and hardly ever argue....a few weeks back she went on holiday with her friends, 12 of them and then I went with my friends, so we didnt see each other for near enoug 4 weeks, so she got back and we seen each other every day and had lots of lol, so she got back and got real upset cause her friend had scored with someone while on holiday and she had a b/f and then cudnt rememebr anything the next day so she was worried she had done something, but was 100% sure she didnt, but why did she get worried about it?? anywya that pass and anyway a week later she has gone away with her mam dad and cousin who is a girl also, and has rang me everyday saying how much shes missing me etc....then yesterday she rings me and says how her mam kicked of with her yesterday because her and her cousin stayed behind at this bar where they had been all night, and got talking to these lads from southampton, and she said oh well a few of them went but then a couple of them stayed, then we went back to there villa for a bit and wen we got bak mam kicked off for us being out so late, shes 18 btw....and i said well i would be ya going to lads hotels at half 4 in the morning, and instead of playing it down she corrected me and said oh no it was a VILLA, which to that i was like, wel ldidnt know what to say......

i trust her that nothing happened but come on, what the hell is she doing going to lads villas for a drink after a bar....and not even playing it down, correcting me when i said hotel etc... and it seemed she didnt even feel bad for doing it ???

opinions please, r i you want any other info ask....i know theres alot but appreciation to anyone wh oreads it lol, thanks in advance

[eightball61]

She's young and she's gonna live young.




ps

What country are you ?

[SALly]

It seems like she may be having a bit of fun. I would definitely question her about her behavior. She is young, but if you two are in a relationship, then she shouldn't do anything behind your back.

[eightball61]

I also want to add that with her being young she's gonna want to do things that she considers "fun". While she has this "fun" you'll need to trust her. Sure there are things to question about what she's doing but she is being honest with you as far as I read.

If she is giving you good reason not to trust her then you need to approach her about this. You need to tell her how it's making you feel as well as what your thinking. You both as a couple will need to work this out together. You can't restrict her but she has to remember that she is in a relationship.

[ivy]

I also want to add that with her being young she's gonna want to do things that she considers "fun". While she has this "fun" you'll need to trust her. Sure there are things to question about what she's doing but she is being honest with you as far as I read.

If she is giving you good reason not to trust her then you need to approach her about this. You need to tell her how it's making you feel as well as what your thinking. You both as a couple will need to work this out together. You can't restrict her but she has to remember that she is in a relationship.


She may be having fun, but why do you believe having fun has to involve living in danger? How many young women end up raped or dead by living this way?( Let me just say more then you probably think) The young lady from Alabama comes to mind, and many here right in Florida. Am I the only one that sees a problem with a young woman staying out all night and going to strangers "villa's"

The other thing that I would be concerned with is her saying she was worried because she couldn't remember what happened but then said she was 100% sure she did nothing wrong?
How can she be worried and be 100% sure?????? No you can not restrict her but if she is living in a way you don't agree with you should break it off with her. Not all young women go out and get drunk to have fun.

Some keep their wits about them. One more thing is I would use protection if I were you and since she has gone out and had at least once not known for sure what she has done, she should get tested for any thing she may have contracted while in a black out.

[PreciousYaya]

I agree with eightball, only because I am in the same situation as your girlfriend. I just turned 19, my Bf is 24. He has done all his partying and is ready to stop. I, on the other hand, am still young and want to go out with friends to clubs etc, that does not mean I am going to go cheat on him and try to meet other guys. I just dont want to regret not having fun in my younger years. You just have to trust her, and trust that she is not going to cheat on you. If it's difficult to trust her, then you two need to sit down and talk about what both of you want. IF she wants to go out and have fun, and you are not happy with that, then she's definately not ready to settle down and be in a serious relationship. Sometimes sacrifices must be made. Communicate with her and see what you both want out of this relationship.

[eightball61]

Ivy, I think you got me all wrong here or maybe it was how I wrote it......Of course, there are things that she needs to look out for but he won't be able to hold her back. It does strike me that she is going bars at the age of 18 but that could be because they live in a different country. This girl is young and she should enjoy her youth while it last.

They both need to have a chat on which direction they want this relationship to go. She seems to still want the relationship but still have the freedom. This is do-able but he will need to make the choice whether he can trust her enough to go out. She will make mistakes in the choices that she makes but the only way she will learn life is if she was to experience it herself.