Awesome Relationships

[Rich]

Hi All-

Just wanted to say that it's nice to be a part of this board and that I hope that I can impart whatever wisdom that I can to help anyone interested in having an awesome relationship, have one.

I'll be checking in periodically to offer whatever advice that I can to those seeking answers.

Love & Practicality,

Rich

[Barbara Jones]

Hi Rich,

Good to see you. In your opinion is there any difference in meeting someone on-line or at a party when trying to get into a serious relationship?

[Rich]

Barbara-

IMO it's not how you start out a relationship together, but the actual trip itself that determines how serious your relationship will and can be.

Meeting someone is the hard part and whether it's online, at a bar or somewhere else, they all have pros and cons so IMO it doesn't matter. Knocking over the first domino is the hard part. Going on line just more readily presents more dominos.

The problem with meeting people online is that people sometimes lie or exaggerate. You also don't really know what they look like.

To me, there needs to be a physical attraction as well as an emotional one for a relationship to succeed. You really can't get that online. Yes, people send pictures, but you can't really trust that the picture that they sent is really of them until you meet them.

I also like the eye contact of meeting with someone face to face. You can see exactly what's going on in the mind and if what you're hearing is the truth. Plus you get physical interaction which is also telling (good or bad).

When I was dating I could tell within 5 or 10 minutes of meeting someone if I could see myself in a relationship with them or not. If I did not see myself in a relationship with them and she was good looking, I would at least try to bed her. Yes, sorry, I was a dog when I was younger :-). But most single men were and are the same way today.

That being said, having a successful, happy and loving serious relationship depends on the persons ability to bring, what I feel are some core ingredients, to the relationship. And the ability to deliver on those core ingredients you'll get a feel for over time. So it's not how you start, but what happens along the way. It's not a point system and you don't get penalized for having started one way or another when meeting someone.

In my opinion, if you want a serious relationship, then you should have a clear cut plan on how to figure out what partner can do that for you. If you go to my web site ( www.awesomerelationships.com ) you can see what I'm talking about.

Get practical. Approach a relationship as if you were buying a house or a car. Come up with a list of likes and dislikes, along with what you feel is important to make a relationship work and then use your dating experience to see if your partner fills the bill. As you date, check off the line items that you have listed. If you can't check off, move on.

I have created a list of 33 key ingredients that go into making a relationship work, be happy and to last long term. In my eyes, if a relationship only has so many of those 33 ingredients, then I don't see it lasting.

If you were buying a house and had a list of 33 items that you created, that would enable you to be happy with your choice, would you buy a house that only met some or a portion of your list? I highly doubt it. And if you did buy it, you wouldn't ultimately be happy with it over the long haul.

The same goes for a relationship. If you're just looking to date, then almost anyone will do. But if you're looking to get married, then you need a game plan and you need to stick to it. Deciding on someone to spend the rest of your life with is a process, like anything else. Be more practical and less emotional about it.

I hope that I answered your questions somewhere in there? LOL

Enjoy,

Rich