I need her...any suggestions?

[jcstylee]

Okay, here's the skinny. I am 27, my girlfriend is 25. The day after Thanksgiving, my girlfriend of almost two years wanted to call it quits. I wasn't making her feel as important as I used to, I missed the warning signs, and it may be too late. We had talked briefly over the weekend, she called me Monday for advice on a schooling issue, and I knew that something needed to be done. I am mostly at fault for this, and have explained that I will make things right. I love her to death, she is the most important thing in my life, and I want her to be my wife given we reconcile. Tuesday after work, I picked up around 2 dozen of her favorite flower, and delivered them to her with a letter coming from the heart. I didn't figure she would want to see me, that's why I wrote the letter. As she smiled accepting my gift of flowers that do not compare to her beauty, she invited me in, I was shaking, mouth was dry, and I proceeded to explain that I did her wrong. We ended up holding each other, kissing, and one thing led to another. We talked again later that night when she got home from school, and things seemed to be going in my favor. She keeps saying that time will tell if we get back together, and that she needs time. Now today, she states that us talking everyday may not be helping things. I told her once again how sorry I was, how much I love her, how I am going to make her mine again, and that I wouldn't call or email her so she can have time. I am missing her a lot, and want to do whatever needs to be done to get back together. How long should I wait to contact her? Should I wait until she contacts me? Is it okay to send flowers to her work, or hand deliver some? This woman is the most important thing in my life, I just want to show her after letting her down. Please help!!!

[Rich]

Jcstylee-

IMO there's no set time frame for anything. Every situation is different and every person is different. You're just going to have to play it by ear and go with what you feel.

Obviously things have been building for awhile and she's going to have to work through her feelings about you. My advice is to let her know that you care and what your feelings are and then back out for a bit. Give her time. If her feelings are true for you, then she'll miss you as well and initiate getting back together.

IMO the last thing that you want to do is to annoy her and push her further from you. You can't force any relationship to be what you want it to be. It needs to be what you both want it to be.

The bottom line in all relationships is to communicate, communicate and communicate. Always talk. Always listen. Of course you need to have a relationship where both parties feel that they can talk about anything and in a lot of relationships, people most often get driven to the point where they don't feel that they can express their feelings. The trick is to not get to that point.

Relationships are works in progress and happiness is not a destination to get to, but how you should be traveling.

Rich