Is this just a phase?

[sweetiepie12345]

Ok my boyfriend and i have been together for about a year and a half.

During the first couple weeks we would be together all the time and what not. he moved to minnesota for me and we moved into an apartment. ok his thing is, is he plays the computer like 24/7 he has a job but when he comes home he goes on it untill sleep time. i ask him to spend time with me but he tells me that he does and isnt going to a movie enough? i get so frusterated..also on weekends he plays all day he says its his days off and he doesnt get to play on weekdays which he does when he gets home from work. we have gotten in many fights over this and i dont want to take the computer time away from him bc his friends from where he use to live play as well. he admitted to me hes addicted WILL this work? i dont know what to do anymore:confused:

[yourstruly]

Ok my boyfriend and i have been together for about a year and a half.

During the first couple weeks we would be together all the time and what not. he moved to minnesota for me and we moved into an apartment. ok his thing is, is he plays the computer like 24/7 he has a job but when he comes home he goes on it untill sleep time. i ask him to spend time with me but he tells me that he does and isnt going to a movie enough? i get so frusterated..also on weekends he plays all day he says its his days off and he doesnt get to play on weekdays which he does when he gets home from work. we have gotten in many fights over this and i dont want to take the computer time away from him bc his friends from where he use to live play as well. he admitted to me hes addicted WILL this work? i dont know what to do anymore:confused:

Ask him what constitutes a relationship to him. Tell him if you wanted someone that was on the computer all the time you would have never agreed to live together, you could have stayed apart. Tell him that if he loved you, he'd restrict his game playing to a minimum, and actually have a relationship with you. Tell him you didn't want just a roommate, you wanted a boyfriend. Tell him to either do it, or get out.

(I KNOW *I* wouldn't tolerate it, so why should you?)

[Diablo]

I have to agree. Some time on the computer would be okay, but if that's all he wants to do, then you aren't getting anything out of the relationship. Tell him to spend more time with you or start saving up for his own place.

[Rich]

You have to ask yourself what it is that you’re looking for in a relationship. Whether or not you’re dating for the sake of dating, or dating for the purpose of getting married, his actions don’t bode well.

You guys should be having fun together. Finding enjoyment together. It sounds like he is immature and this relationship doesn’t sound solid. You can also try to force him to be with you by saying that it’s either his computer or you. But quite honestly, should you really have to force your BF to want to be with you? My answer is no. I’d suggest that you end it with this guy, as he really isn’t looking to be “in love” and have the relationship be his focal point in life. Maybe when he grows up mentally some more he will be, but he isn’t now.

I’d suggest moving on if this isn’t the type of relationship that you want or dreamed of having. Being in love, being happy and having that special feeling inside of you that you get when you’re with someone that so turns you on and that is fun to be with, well, it’s what life is all about. Except for your BF that is, who quite honestly and obviously, gets his enjoyment from a computer and not you. Such a shame to as computers can’t keep you warm on those cold Minnesota days and nights. J His loss. Move on. And don’t feel guilty and stay in this relationship because he moved out there for you. He’s a big boy and can just as easily move back home, which quite honestly, is where his heart is.