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View Full Version : A heck of a mess....


buffalobill
01-01-2005, 03:33 AM
I really need some advice!!!!!
I will try and keep this as brief as possible. Me and my girlfriend have been together for 15 months. It was just recently that she found out i had another email which i used to cyber with. Now we both see differently on this subject. She thinks i am cheating, and i think i am just getting my rocks off from it. I have no contact with these people other than when i am doing "the deed". Now in my eyes, i would rather my partner being doing the same thing as i was caught doing than going out into the "real world" and getting a piece of action. Maybe i am wrong and this will cause some people to agree/disagree, but that is not really the subject here. Since that night she found out i was doing that. My house has been receiving calls from some guy that i don't know. She takes the call and basically "hides" away from me while she talks to him. She has 3-4 hour talks with this guy, and even instant messages him online for hours after one of these conversations. She says it is just a friend. But, she has been out till the wee hours of the morning and when i confronted her about it. She finally caved in and told me she was out with him (after some evidence searching on my part, not gonna get into details). Since the day she caught me cybering, she has asked me to move out as soon as i found a place. I love this woman with all my heart (also 2 young girls i adore), and if i knew this action would of caused this chain of events i would never have done it. But the damage has been done, and there is not much i can do but try to mend some open wounds. But the question i need to ask here is, is it worth even trying to fix this relationship if she is interested/cheating with another guy and lying about seeing him? Any help would be greatly appreciated thankyou.

CalistaClap
01-03-2005, 02:10 PM
Do you feel that she has started meeting/chating with this other guy only after she found you cybering?

I do think that cybering when you have a partner is wrong. Your partner should be the only one who you have ual encounters of ANY kind with. If you feel the need to get thrills of some kind from someone else, then you probably aren't ready to be in the serious relationship. I don't blame her for being angry.

You said that she asked you to move out. Is your relstionship with her over in her eyes? Or are you still currently living together "as a couple" until then?

If she has ended things with you, and is being nice by letting you stay until you get a place of your own, then she is doing nothing wrong by seeing someone else. But I suggest that you leave ASAP, because that is just going to be akward.

cherklatch
01-07-2005, 11:32 PM
I agree with Calista - there's an old saying "when you make your bed be prepared to sleep in it" - shame on you. If you had this loving wonderful relationship with your partner why the hell did you need the cyber crap. Get going - she deserves better and MAJORLY learn from this TERRIBLE mistake for your next relationship. Unless she is willing to go to counseling (and it sounds as if she isn't - it sounds as if she has moved on) to heal the wounds from YOUR actions, this relationship sounds like it's over. Be a man and let her find happiness with that other guy who hopefully will find her love enough and won't need cyber crap as well. ALWAYS REMEMBER THAT FOR EVERY ACTION THERE IS AN EQUAL REACTION. Now that you'll be "single" again, you'll have all the right in the world to do your cyber thing and I hope it makes you happy. You gave up a good woman for the sake of a fake piece of ass. WHY ARE MOST MEN SUCH IDIOTS. :mad: