How do you get over losing the love or your life?

[lostinthisworld]

:( I am 24yrs old and i have been married for about 4yrs now and together for about 7yrs.

Recently i was going through our computer and found that my wife has been making a lot of guy friends which isn't bad but then the website has these ranks or awards you can give each member. I looked into her friends list and there are 3 guys that she ranked as a "Hunk" and 2 other as "Cute". Well after looking at there pictures i notice that with one of the guys they have been emailing each other back and forth and sending pics. He lives in another country and she says he has a g/f which on his profile it does but why did she start talking to him??

After i confronted her about this we talked and it ended up with her saying she feels she is no longer in love with me:eek: :( .

After talking more she says that i have hurt her deeply because since my daughter was born (she is 2 1/2 yrs old) i have not spent much time with her or my wife. I work 2 jobs 1 from 8-4pm and another form 1-5:30am. On weekends i would spend sometime but then other days i would have other plans. I never realized it was so bad to where my wife was questioning her feelings for me.

We would argue before and she would comment saying i need to make more time for my family but it never came across as its really serious and if i dont change i will lose my family.

So now its my fault and i cant take it. My wife says she cant change how she feels but we can take it day by day and basically hope for a miracle. I cant make her fall back in love with me can i ??????????

Should i put myself through the torture of hoping that within this next year she will fall back in love with me. ( I say a year bkuz we just reniewed our lease and we both dont have the money to move out on our own yet ).

I dont want to just give up and lose her. I look at it as im not giving up without a fight, but is this a fight i can win??

How am i going to move on from this if she does leave me? To me she is the one for me and no one else. If i met the love of my life how can you love again? I am new to all of this.

Me and my wifes situation is a lot more complicated then this but i dont want to write a novel.

Here is a brief:

We met at 18 and dated for 2yrs. We were going to get married at 20 until she cheated on me. We broke up for 2 yrs and then got back together. We have a 2 1/2 yr old daughter. I dont regret giving her a 2nd chance but now i dont understand how my wife wont give me a chance to change. She just says she isnt in love with me, but if you spent so much time with someone and did love that person and wouldnt you want it to work?? Wouldnt you at least try??

I asked my wife that if i spent more time with my family i wouldnt be in this position. So then now that i say i will change wont she give me a chance. Why didnt she tell me when she first started questioning her love? Why did she wait until she no longer loves me?

IM LOST!!!!!!!!!:confused:

[loverboy]

u will need to get her attracted back to u again. ket her know all the love that u have for her . let her feel the love , the passion , the desire that u have for her .ler her know how much u love her . i have this interesting add for u hope that this will help u alot
http://www.iwishisaidno.com/forum/197-how-win-back-someones-feelings-once-they-lost.html
hope that wil help u as it did for me
best of luck man .

[SALly]

Why did she start talking to him? Well, you weren't around ever and she was lonely. Wanted to feel alive and wanted. Wanted someone to treat her special, wanted someone to talk to.
It could be too late. If the love is gone then the love is gone. You guys are pretty young, it seems she wants to live a little.

[SALly]

Also- it sounds by with what you wrote that she did try to tell you. You said you would argue about you spending more time with them, but you didn't think it was that serious. Well- now you know it was that serious. Sometimes people need to LISTEN more, and not just assume they know what the other is thinking and feeling.
Don't bring up the past either. Just because she cheated a long time ago and you took her back, doesn't really mean a darn thing right now.
Goodluck.

[yourstruly]

I think this happens in alot of marriages/relationships where one or both are workaholics. You may see it as doing the right thing to make a good life for the two of you financially, but to be honest, it in turn, ruined your marriage. You neglected your wife, plain and simple. And she tried to tell you. But you weren't listening.

So to hope for a miracle at this point, is almost fruitless. You can try. You can take the positive route. But as long as there is a computer in your house, and as long as you are working long hours, and as long as you aren't around much, your wife is going to seek attention from other men.

Also.....if you are working two jobs, then why in the hell can't either of you afford to move if you should break up? That doesn't make sense.