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ricerocket
01-12-2005, 07:25 PM
Well before I illustrate some examples of my relationship with the person I thought was the love of my life, here are the bear essentials. I was engaged to this girl and dated her for 5 years. She cheated on me for about 4 of 5 years with the same individual and is now having a relationship with him. We were best friends and I am to blame for not correcting the problem when I could have best (when it first happened). I always took her back now I paying for that.

Ok, so here goes my rant:

Point 1: She calls me "I thought I saw you in your car this morning, how were your holidays, SO WHO ARE YOU DATING"?

My Take: She just trying to see if I'll stick around, she doesn't care about how my holidays were. Last year she returned my birthday presents because we broke up then dated again a week after my birthday. She's told me she doesn't care for my mom and sister in laws. Another sick antic.

Point 2: I wish we could still talk and BE FRIENDS

My Take: Well when I asked her to go xmas shopping and get some lunch she said she couldn't cause she with him, well, last I checked friends could go out to lunch and shop together??!! I don't have a problem with people being faithful however when you stress how bad you want to be my friend then don't use that as an excuse. She's just spying on me to see if I'm still hangin around for her.

Point 3: Always asking me if I contacted Rick, sometimes completey convinced I did…

My Take: I'm a US Soldier and have been taught better then too harass and waste my time stalking others. How old is she 12? I can't blame her fully for this because thats what type of person her new bf is and it has undoubltly been brainwashed down to her.

Point 4: She always says that I should stay in contact with her parents. Using old joke names we used to have about her father etc...

My Take: Yup, just tying to make my life more miserable. Trying every way to have me kept to the side.

Point 5: When I told her I was going to email Rick she called she completely lost it and begged me not to do it.

My Take: This is hard to figure out, most people would say that it's just evil. You made your bed, now sleep it in it. This was a major antact that was used against me. Why is it not ok for me to do the same even though I would not because I have higher standards for myself. Who is she to freak out over the phone when I intimidated her to use this against her after how many times it was done to me.

Conclusion/Need Help: As you can see I have been twisted, chewed up, spit out over and over again but I always try to think I can still have something with this girl. Any advice on what to do to get over her and ladies are my takes accurate as to what she is trying to accomplish?

Sorry for the lengthy.

-rr

CalistaClap
01-12-2005, 07:32 PM
Yea, I'd say she is trying to do exactly what you think she is, keep you on the side.

You have to let her go. She didn't just cheat on you once, or twice, but for 4 years, and now has a new b/f.

Staying friends after a relationship is next to impossible. Staying on "good terms" is another thing, and I think gets mixed up with being friends too often.
The longer and more serious the relationship, the harder it is to be friends.

Stick with your gut instinct and continue moving on without her. Cut off contact if it will make the healing process easier.

eightball61
01-13-2005, 01:08 PM
You have many problems here but you mind-set is in the right place on each one. The best way to get this all over and done with is completely stop all contact and communication with her.

She cheated on you 4 out of 5 years. She has done a lot of emotional damage to you and as you see and point out talking to her is not making anything better.

There is no easy way to get over someone but the best possible way to start is stop all communication. Yes, it will be hard but she states she still wants to talk but thats to keep base if you are still hanging around. If she really wanted to hang then she would.

Rich
01-13-2005, 01:25 PM
Can't understand why you would want ANY type of relationship with this girl. Nothing but problems.

Are you a glutton for punishment?

Move on and forget her.

Rich

eightball61
01-13-2005, 01:33 PM
Are you a glutton for punishment?

Move on and forget her.

Rich


I couldn't agree more with rich.