ust93
05-31-2006, 05:00 AM
Hi all,
I just need some advice. Up until a about a month ago
I was in a relationship with a fellow worker who is a few years younger than me. I was hesitant at first because of the work situation and the age difference but I was just swept away by his good looks and charm. Things were good for a little while, but we never actually spent time together away from work and did most of our talking on the phone. This made me kind of suspicious and finally I asked if he was married. He laughed and said no. Through the grapevine at work though I found out the truth that he indeed was, and had a son. I was sad and devastated. I wasnt sure what to do. Should I approach him and tell him I know and risk making a scene at work?? Or should I let things cool on their own and hopefully it would fall apart on its own?? Well both happened eventually. About 4 months after I found out, I couldnt keep it in anymore and I told him that I knew. He made excuses, as expected, and he told me that he was just trying to protect me. He made ME feel like the bad guy... I try to keep my distance at work, but I am ashamed, I feel guilty, I feel embarrassed and humiliated. Come to find out, everyone knew he was married and no one told me.. No one. Now, believe it or not, he has a new fling going on at work and it kills me to see him. . I feel so many emotions.. anger, jealousy, etc. I just feel like a big joke and I'm not sure how to cope with it. He and his friends stare and snicker I'm sure but the only thing I can do is keep on going and try to find strength to get thru my day. I'm beginning to wonder if I should have said anything at all. My friends tell me I did the right thing but I feel so sad I'm just not sure.. Any helpful thoughts would be appreciate:(
I just need some advice. Up until a about a month ago
I was in a relationship with a fellow worker who is a few years younger than me. I was hesitant at first because of the work situation and the age difference but I was just swept away by his good looks and charm. Things were good for a little while, but we never actually spent time together away from work and did most of our talking on the phone. This made me kind of suspicious and finally I asked if he was married. He laughed and said no. Through the grapevine at work though I found out the truth that he indeed was, and had a son. I was sad and devastated. I wasnt sure what to do. Should I approach him and tell him I know and risk making a scene at work?? Or should I let things cool on their own and hopefully it would fall apart on its own?? Well both happened eventually. About 4 months after I found out, I couldnt keep it in anymore and I told him that I knew. He made excuses, as expected, and he told me that he was just trying to protect me. He made ME feel like the bad guy... I try to keep my distance at work, but I am ashamed, I feel guilty, I feel embarrassed and humiliated. Come to find out, everyone knew he was married and no one told me.. No one. Now, believe it or not, he has a new fling going on at work and it kills me to see him. . I feel so many emotions.. anger, jealousy, etc. I just feel like a big joke and I'm not sure how to cope with it. He and his friends stare and snicker I'm sure but the only thing I can do is keep on going and try to find strength to get thru my day. I'm beginning to wonder if I should have said anything at all. My friends tell me I did the right thing but I feel so sad I'm just not sure.. Any helpful thoughts would be appreciate:(