Advice Needed

[bermbanger007]

My girlfriend of one year that lives with me chats with her ex a few times a week online. She is always checking up on his profile checking his pictures blah blah ....She says there just friends and thats it and she knows it bothers me and she thinks im just jealous and insecure. I recently told her id move to school with her while she finishes her last two years ...selling my house quitting my job the whole nine yards but this is eating me up and she dont seem to care.... whos the ass here me or her????

[bvillalta]

Dude...dont sell your house, quit your job, or any of that!! Shes treating you unfairly..first of all. You have every right to question her for looking up her ex like that. She has no reason to do that while you are with her. None whatsoever! Second...no girl in this world is worth giving up everything you worked so hard for. What makes you think she wont dump you in the future..then what?? Now youve just sold your house, lost your job, and youre somewhere else besides where your life originally was. Dont do this man...your going to regret it if you do. There are plenty of other women out there that wont treat you like this...trust me!! Let me know how it goes and good luck to you!!

[Misha]

Do you have a problem with it because you don't trust her, or has there been a bad relationship in the past that makes you feel this way?

I ask, because I am really good friends with an ex boyfriend of mine and it IS possible to just be friends. BUT-if you have shown concern over this and she knows that it's eating you up, then there should be some discussion and maybe a little bit of consideration for your feelings and it doesn't seem that there is any.

I wouldn't say either of you are asses. After all, we don't know her (and no, I am not saying you're lieing or anything of the sort) but a little compromise is always worth trying out before tossing everything in the can.

I have to agree though, don't give up everything you've worked hard for over someone who may not be there for you afterwards. That's a huge step and often times a mistake that people make (the things we do for love). I myself made the same mistake. After my divorce I didn't have much but what I did have was mine. I gave it all away and together me and my fiance bought new stuff (he paid for most of it). All of the furniture in this house is his and now we're on some pretty sharp rocks and if he leaves, I will literally have nothing left.

Think about what YOU want out of the relationship and then maybe make a list of the pros and cons of the relationship. Every comunion must have a little lee-way from time to time but if you're the one doing all the giving then it's time to seek out other options.