sorry for the double post...wasn't sure where to put it.....

[wickedpixie]

dumped pyscho/schizo boy.....had to.....he's more insane than I am, that's not good, not good at all
he was manipulating me and trying to make me believe that I did something to cause this behavior in him.....THAT'S NOT POSSIBLE....

told him I didn't wanna deal with his shit anymore
he came to my house drunk out of his face at 2:30am....

on a weekday no less, that was enough for me to say....
I wanted a man not a 16yr old boy...get out of my sight and stay there...this is not a flop house.

I told him love was about trust, understanding, and compromise and he is giving me none of that...

I said everything I've held back and I know he will be back, but i will press charges if he harrasses me...
And the next time he shows up at my house drunk the door will be shut to him.......
the next time he shows up uninvited, the door will be shut to him.......
in general.....the door is shut to him.

I'm trying to be "OK" with my decision because I know it's what had to be done......

BUT I'M SO DOWN RIGHT NOW, I WISH I WAS HOME SO I JUST SLEEP, AND SLEEP AND SLEEP AND SLEEP AND SLEEP...

[airin31]

I went through an mentally abusive, semi-physically abusive relationship when I was 15 - 18 and the ONLY thing you can do is keep that door SHUT! You need to have self-respect and KNOW that you can and will find someone that will treat you like you DESERVE to be treated. Any way you look at it, it is better to be alone then to be with someone like that.

[Rich]

If in your heart you know that you're doing the right thing, then don't be depressed over it.

It's easy to go into a shell and give yourself a pity party, but you can't and shouldn't. For yourself and your little girls sake.

Time to snap out of it. Do some exercise. Get the juices flowing. Take your little girl to a gymboree or something and watch the joy on her face as she plays. Get a lift from watching that. See the joy and think back to when you were small and your whole life was ahead of you.

Don't feel down about the choices that you've made so far. Instead, fell a sense of motivation that this is where your life turns around and begins.

If the choices that you've made so far haven't worked out liked you have hoped, then it's time to make different choices. You're 30 and beautiful. The whole world is still before you and you have a lot of life ahead of you. Make a choice to make it better.

Happiness isn't a destination, but a mode of transportation instead. People often say, "I'll be happy when..." But when never comes because it always turns into something else.

Just choose to be happy. Get rid of the negatives in your life. Take control of your life. As mentioned before, if you don't know where you're going, then any road will get you there.

Where are YOU going? Do you even know what you REALLY want? What are you REALLY doing to get it? Pull yourself together, feel empowered and feel motivated. You're a single mom taking good care of a 5 year old girl and you're making it. Feel proud of yourself and what you've done so far. Positive choices produce positive outcomes. Negative choices produce negative outcomes. Those are universal laws.

In life, when all is said and done and all the smoke clears, we base all of our life's decisions on two things, love and fear. Think about that and every major decision that you've made so far. Was your ultimate decision based on love or of fear?

Most often times in relationships and in our life we make decisions based on fear. We fear that our choice will either hurt us or hurt someone else. We fear that maybe we can't make it. We fear failure. We fear this or we fear that and than make a decision based on that.

Just know that basing a decision on fear is not the right choice. Love is all there is and all that we should work towards. Always choose the path of love because it's what your soul ultimately wants. And you know it as true because when you make a decision based on fear, you get that knot in the pit of your stomach. Love doesn't do that.

Love is so easy, so pure, so peaceful. There's a reason why God made it that it only takes one muscle to smile and 30 odd ones to frown. Because he/she/it wants us to smile and be happy.

Choose the path of love and happiness for YOU. Follow YOUR soul and it will never lead you astray. Live the life that your soul has come here to live. It's trying to guide you, you just have to listen. God, Angels and our Guides talk to us all the time, it's just that we often don't listen or hear. There's a reason why all spiritual works say to go within and that because that's where all the answers are.

Go within WP, see what you're being guided to do. Trust it.

My sermon is over. Go in love and peace.

Rich

[mmsharon]

Good post, Rich.

wickedpixie, if he has the keys to your home, remember to change the locks.

Hope you are feeling slightly better now.

[Rich]

Thank you for the compliment MMSharon.

Rich

[wickedpixie]

I am proud of myself for getting where I am from where I was....

was feeling a lot more "empowered" before I met him...

well we all stumble a bit here and there I suppose...

[Rich]

That's so true, WP. We all do make mistakes. That's why pencils have erasers. The beauty is to learn from those mistakes so as to not make them again.

Surround yourself with positive energy. Sounds like your ex bf was a negative drain on you.

Rich

[wickedpixie]

thats exactly what he was.............. :mad:

[Rich]

Then there's no reason to feel down. :-)

Recharge your batteries (and get new ones for your little friend) and jump back in when you're ready. There's nothing like a new, fresh and positive start.

I hope that you find a true love on every level because it is the most wonderful feeling.

A good partner fulfills and uplifts you, not drags you down.

Good luck.

Rich