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View Full Version : Had a weird dream, and to top it all off, he's rubbing salt in the wounds.


CalistaClap
02-10-2005, 12:32 PM
I think that I've been doing fairly good without him. I haven't cried over him since the last time we talked on the phone (the day he ended it and blamed it on me).

I have been thinking about it, but most of that was anger for all the nasty things he's done to me in the past, and then the grande finale of nastiness at the end of it. More or less when I thought about it I would just get so mad, and that's the way it has been for the past 2 weeks.

I didn't find myself missing him or crying over him, basically because I was so mad. I didn't even dream about him....until lastnight.

I woke up after this dream, almost stunned at how real it was. In the dream I went to his house to get my cats, and my fish. He came home, and I was crying and telling him how much I loved him, and wanted him back. At first (in the dream) he was normal telling me that he missed me so much too, Then he got cold telling me he didn't want to be with me, and was telling me things he's done since we've been apart. I was crying and begging him to tell me he loved me. Then all of a sudden I snapped awake, and was stunned. Then I was back to being angry when I thought of him. (Which I try to aviod doing).

I thought I was getting through it fairly well without going through the missing and "withdrawl" stage. I wonder if this was a sign to myself telling me how much I really do miss him and still love him, or if it was simply just a dream.

Oh and another update, he's been down my way alot! Her (his new super young jailbait g/f) parents live down the road from me. A few people has told me that they've seen him. Funny, when he was with me for 2 years, he never had any gas $ to come down even when I offered to give him some, now he is down all the time, sort of rubbing it in my face. To get to her parents house, there is another road which saves alot of time coming from his house. In order to go by my house, and all my friends houses, he has to take the long way, and that's just what he does. Then he goes to her grandmothers which is only like 5 houses over from mine. Does he really feel it necessairy to rub salt in the wounds?? I'm not sure what I ever did to him that made me is #1 enemy, and he purposly goes out of his way to hurt me. Because it's obvious that's what he's doing, Seems to me all I did was forgive him for his cheating , lying and sneaking around, and being there for him whenever he was down, and support him on top of it. My logics must be backwards, because I thought they were all kind acts towards him.

eightball61
02-10-2005, 12:44 PM
Dreams can play a wierd role with emotions. The dream felt so real that it has you thinking again. Sure you miss him but you dont miss the pain. I really think you are doing great for yourself and keep it up. Its not going to be an easy route and you know that.

This is still all new to you because it has just happened. You may have more dreams like this but keep thinking if you have to all the bad he put you through and how its not worth it. I mean it seems you are still checking up on his moves knowing about him seeing that girl. Its hard to just drop but you need to move on from the whole thing or else it will be harder.

CalistaClap
02-10-2005, 12:52 PM
I am not checking up on him! I would love nothing more than to never have to hear about or see either of them again.

But it's kinda hard when he is purposly where I am, with her. How can I avoid it if he is doing it just to get at me? I know he is.

How can I not be affected my someone who completely stomped on me when I was already down, and it now adding to the fire my wanting me to see him and her together?

I dont leave my neighborhood execpt to go to work. Ever. All my friends are there, that's where we spend the weekends. It's a very small community way out in the sticks. He knows that, and is driving 45 mins from his house, to actually rub salt in my wounds.

Yea that hurts, and it makes it a hell of alot harder to get through. I just don't understand his cruelness. Why do I deserve it?

eightball61
02-10-2005, 01:04 PM
You dont deserve any of this nor does any human out there. Those that hurt continue to hurt. One day he may get an alarming wakeup call and realize his actions but some dont. He still has the mind of a 15 yr old and think he can get away with it all.

He lost the best possible thing that couold happen to him and thats you. I am not blaming you on checking up with him but it seems you know alot into his moves. If you have people around you that talk about it then just tell them that you dont want to hear it or just dont hang out with them. HE is old new now and you are trying to move on. You dont need to take a step back.

Rich
02-11-2005, 05:52 PM
He's rubbing your nose in it because he wants to hurt you like you hurt him by taking everything out of the place that you shared. It's his way of trying to get back at you.

Don't let him see that you're upset or that he's getting to you. What I mean by that is to not give him the finger as he goes by. If you do anything, then he'll know that he's getting to you. If you see him drive by or outside, just turn away and ignore him. That will get his goat. Just see him for being immature and petty and this will help you laugh it off and deal with it.

As for your dreams. You had deep feelings for him and your anger over the past few weeks has surpressed those feelings for the past little while. As your anger subsides, your subconscious is working through the other issues that you're trying to resolve in your head as to why this happened.

It's kind of shallow, but you just have to accept in your head that you're ok, that you did nothing wrong and that your break up was the result of his immaturity and or drug addiction.

CalistaClap
02-14-2005, 01:26 PM
He's rubbing your nose in it because he wants to hurt you like you hurt him by taking everything out of the place that you shared. It's his way of trying to get back at you.



Why would he be trying to get back at me for me taking MY stuff? I only took the things that I bought. I had told him that I would leave most of it, but when I found out he had been seeing her before things ended with us I changed my mind. How could that be hurting him??? I just decided that what came with me left with me, because I wasn't furnishing a house for him and his jailbait g/f.

eightball61
02-14-2005, 02:17 PM
I think what Rich is trying to say is your ex coming down to see this young girl and he never made that attempted while dating him. With him coing down he knows you may hear about it and just doing it to hurt you. Its like a pay back thing and this could be the reason but also another reason is since she lived close to you he never came down so he didn't have to face the fact you both meeting up.

Rich
02-14-2005, 04:41 PM
Even though it was your stuff and you had every right to take it back, he just views it as you trying to hurt him.

Him going to see her and purposefully driving by your way is his attempt to get you back.

I'm not saying that you did anything wrong by taking his stuff.

Calista....your ex-bf has a petty, immature and childish mind. You can't assume people like that think logically or that they maturely reason things out.

They live in a tit for tat world.

CalistaClap
02-14-2005, 05:34 PM
But the thing is she doesn't live by me anymore. Her parents live about 10 minutes down the road from me. Which our road is one big loop, and it is alot quicker to go in the other side to get to her parents house then to go the long way and go by my house.

She has been living between her sisters house and who ever her boyfriend is at the time. She goes to high school out there (which is 45 mins away). So really, there is no reason for them to be down here.

I really don't get why after everything he has done to me, by me actually doing one thing (taking my things) that wasn't ment to be hurtful, he sees it as if he needs to get me back. Hasn't he "got me" enough? I just wanted my stuff. Why should things that I worked hard for be left for someone who did what he and she did?

Anyways, I just wish he would stay away.

eightball61
02-14-2005, 05:56 PM
Anyways, I just wish he would stay away.


I couldn't agree with you more. Its doing no good hearing about it or even knowing about it. Hopefully this childish ex. will grow up and learn what real life is....