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View Full Version : Need Some Opinions/Advice Thanks


QHB64
05-28-2008, 09:13 PM
Whats up everyone. Im new to this forum and this is my first time on anytype of relationship forums. I want some advice from new people instead of my friends. Anyhow let me explain my situation. I met this girl about a month in a half ago, and we have been going out and chilling together. First I took her out a couple times just to get to know her, and I found out she just got out of a bad relationship about 3 months ago. She is younger, 20, and Im 24 so I wanted to make sure she was completely over the other guy.
She assured me she was over the guy, but how he treated her still bothered her. I figured what she needed at the time was more of a friend/comforter, rather just a guy trying to get in her pants. We have been hanging out a lot though and I really started to like her. I mean she has brought me over to her place to have dinner with her mother and little brother. I have taken her out a lot, movies, to her and her little brother to the movies. The last couple of weeks she has came over to my place and watched movies till like 4 in the morning with me. When we chilling watching the movies she hops right into the bed with me a snuggles up. I did not make anytype of move on her, but I wanted to. See Im a little confused with her, and this is like my first time being confused over a girl. I thought I was in the friend zone. Which would have been fine, I have plenty of girls who are just friends.
But know I have developed feelings for her and Im not sure if I am in her friend zone or not. Im a little confused. Last weekend I invited her out with me and some of my friends. We went to a club, and we were dancing together. Another girl I know walks up to me and just starts talking to me and trying to dance with me. I tell the girl Im just chilln with Tiffany, the girl im talking about, so the girl just walks off. Tiffany then turns to me and says wuts her problem. She just stepped in like I was not even here with you. Now she said this in a jealous kind of way she def. did not like it.
Anyhow I decided to let her know how I feel. I told her Im starting to feel you a lot. Her response was I like you a lot too or I would not come and hang out with you all the time. But Im not ready for a committed relationship right now, but if we keep hanging out in the future that could happen. I just dont want you to get your hopes up right now. And Im like thats cool I respect that, I just felt I should let you know how I feel. We both said we still wanted to keep things like they are, keep talking and hanging out.
Here is my question am I in her friend zone or what. I have never really been in a situation like this. I have either started out with a girl as my girl or we are just friends. Never really been stuck where I don't know. I mean when I first meet her she told me how cute she thought I was, and I told her she was cute and y. Should I just keep hanging out with her and having over to my place. Or if I am in her friend zone should I loose the feelings I have developed for her (before they get worse) and just be solely a friend to her. Any advice or suggestions would be appreciated. I guess a girls point of view would be best, but advice or suggestions from anyone would help. Thanks a lot everyone and sorry for the long post.

eightball61
05-28-2008, 11:59 PM
Welcome to the boards :)

Many will tell you this however I'll be the first :p.....You'll need to be patient with her. I'm sure you now feel relieved that you let her know how you feel and she told you as well however she's not ready for anything more. She does see you as a comfort zone which is good in a way to you and her as well. Keep being who you are to her because this is why she is hanging with you. From her past relationship she has probably lost trust in a partner and herself which will need time to rebuild. She needs to rediscover who she is too so with that said be the best of a friend that you can to her and maybe things will turn for more down the road.

Good Luck :)

ChristinaMH
05-29-2008, 04:48 AM
In my opinion, you're not in the friend zone, so don't sweat it. If you were, her response would be more something along the lines of an awkward "Oh... I just want to be friends (your name), I don't feel that way about you. I hope this doesn't make things awkward."

Instead you got a seemingly truthful answer that is to your benefit, she's telling you that she likes you and returns the feelings, but that a relationship isn't right for her at the time because she's not completely over her last bad relationship or another reason of her's, that way you're not going into it on the wrong foot.

And yes, patients! (although I think that's the wrong way to spell it) Hope it goes well.