Player,Games,Vanity,Used???

[lostandconfused]

im 35 man have a 5 yr. old. Been alone from my bad divorce for almost 5 yrs. Got serious with a recently divorced attractive 32 yr old gal. Her second divorce and no kids. I had a alot of respect for her knowing her from 10 years ago. First date was great. She calls next day ask if we can watch a movie tonight. sure come over watch movie play around? have ! I was really surprised. Then its ive never done this before.....etc. ok so all she wants is . Fine, next day same thing then fourth date come meet my parents? Whole time she is saying lets slow down. ok, she calls three times a day every night, but we actually start falling for each other. we really get along. second week, ask about money,land,home,business? I get this feeling? She never stops telling me about the money she got from her last divorce. how to invest,what to do with it.... After two months i ask her. OK how much? she tell. i say dont bad , but not enough to invest but in a home. she had already bought some land, and had plans to go back to school, Hints come about Not wanting to go to school.....etc. Dinner conversation about her f@*& money Look i dont care about your money i dont need it! Oh? we are getting very serious, but she is very controling from the start,jealous, and trys to make me jealous, I'm not! Know i smoke from the begining, i dont work out like she does, but i look trim. She is almost like a nagging mother. I like to drink beer and go to the pub few days a week. This makes her crazy, but when the girls go out she tells me! Im going out. ok. I always asked? We start arguing a bit because my kid is with me through holidays and i will not let her stay or have with child in house. new years eve we have a blow out. call next day, im at wits end. i care for her but i myself feel im not ready for all this and she been divorced only a few months. I just want my next love or marriage to be the last. she comes over hangs out with me and my kid for the night, knowing we need to talk about us after my kid goes back to her moms the next day. Then we can talk have and spend some us time together and alone. Put my kid in the bed, we talk, i ask her if its her ex,hoildays.....etc. NO, we hug and talk about new years eve, talk about , and i said well, im want so bad i relieved my self in the shower this morning. You would have thought i cheated on her! Then we talk about living together, kid......etc. She says i unfortunatly have a kid in a strange way. Well, next night i take my kid home to her moms, i go to girl friends house to talk. she has this long list of stuff to go over. Im tired i tell her i do not want to talk about it tonight... please. she doesnt like 1. answer. 2. answer. and 3 i get up and say im going home. told me if i left we were done. she chases me out the door and i drive off. several days go past and we speak of her getting some things from my home.ok....
a few days go past and i call and ask if we can now talk. NO! well, we talk a couple days later and i open up to her and explain ME. she crys im upset, and give her some time....... well, now she will not talk to me, and i left her alone over a month ago. She knows were i hang out and she walks in saturday night with a hand full of guys(players and starts smearing in my face. I get up and walk out. Makes a comment later to a friend i left rather quickly.?? I was fine, but next night i HAD to call and cuss her out for coming in there. Told me she would have me arrested if i ever call again? Did i do something to this chick or does she have vanity,ego control issues that she couldnt use then biut can now? I care about her and i really think i hurt her because i did say some nasty things to her, but she knew my life style before we ever got to this level? Slow down im not ready, but acts like she want to get married? GAmes or what?
Knowing i care about her and walking in there was just wrong. agree or disagree?

[eightball61]

It seems like something is there but not all the way there. She could be playing games to smear what you lost in your face but its really hard to tell her actions. I mean when she wanted to talk you didn't and when you wanted to talk she didn't. If you want a relationship to move further then you need to talk whenever its possible to work out issues. If you continue to hide and she continues to play the game as not wanting to talk when you want to then that wil set up for failure again like it allready has.

Maybe you both should get a fresh start if you want to start things over again. Go out for a coffe with her and explain your thoughts and wishes then after have her express herself and what she wants. You both have to compromise in oder to make this work. Relationships are not a game and shouldn't be toyed with. I know you may not want to talk about the same thing over and over and you need to make that known to her but you have to be willing to talk when an important issue arises. I do this is somewhat of a help and I was able to understand wht you meant.