A paradox with my friend

[Silverlion]

Hi everyone

Ok, I have a friend who is a girl called Laura, and i love to hang out with her. We play games, we go to the city, we have lunch, etc. I value the friendship very highly.

I met her at a friends birthday party and its been just over 2 years and we have become close friends, I have intense feelings for her and would love her to be my girlfriend.

At the start of the friendship we had dinner and we cleared the air. She knows i fancy her but she only wants a friendship. Since its been over 2 years since then i think we have become closer and i want to ettempt again.

I want to ask her how she feels about me now because i want to make the affort before she gets a boyfriend but if i do it i could risk the friendship. I feel like i will explode because i cant tell her how i feel and shes on my mind always.

Im stuck between a rock and a hard place.

I need advice please.

Adam

[Diablo]

Feeling the way that you do, you may as well come out and tell her what's on your mind. As lit up as you are, she's either going to reciprocate or you'll lose her altogether. It's been two years, she might have changed her mind by now; however, if she hasn't, you're likely to lose her.

[Silverlion]

Thank you the reply, it helped alot.

can i ask another question?

Can Unrequitted love freindships end only in broken hearts and sadness?

[eightball61]

She knew from the start what you wanted and if she hasn't made a move yet then she still wants a friendship only. You're risking a lot if you tell her but again you did this before and you both still stayed friends. As my advice though you only love once and so take the risks because either way it will be a lost to you so you having nothing to lose.

[Howard]

You could give it a try but you might lose her,It's a big risk.

[Diablo]

To answer your question, it depends on how willing you are to blow off your feelings for her if she says no. You could keep her friendship if you blow off your other feelings for her. She might reciprocate, but that may be unlikely. If she says no, you might want to find another girl to go out with. 2 years is long enough to wait.

[Silverlion]

Ty. yea, big risk :(

[Silverlion]

Ive decided to not do anyhting, she knows how i feel so it up to her. besides theirs plenty of fish in the sea.

[Howard]

Ive decided to not do anyhting, she knows how i feel so it up to her. besides theirs plenty of fish in the sea.




So you're going to move on?

[MalahFae]

I think if you explain your feelings to her, but also make it clear that you would rather a friendship with her than nothing at all, it will give her the space to truly show what she feels. Over time things change, and often times friends develope feelings. Other times they just feel the close almost sibling like connection. If she is truly your friend i doubt she would end the friendship just bc you have feelings for her. its all about how you discuss it with her. Do not come off as if you are giving her an ultimatom. Its doubtful that she will respond well to that. Just be open and honest and see how things go. Good luck :)

[Silverlion]

Yea, last night we were at my quiz night to raise money for my art show and i i relized i have to because i either going to lose her one way or the other. when she gets a boyfriend i will be on the side as a guy she may talk to sometime but i wont be a priority in her life and it will kill me to see her with another guy. Im thinking i want to cut down on my contact with her and and have some space maybe.

[Silverlion]

last night at quiz night she saw me talking to other girls who i know from ym tafe art course and said stuff like 'you asking her out and do you like this girl' so thats a diffinate clue she doesnt have the same feelings towards me.

[Howard]

Yea, last night we were at my quiz night to raise money for my art show and i i relized i have to because i either going to lose her one way or the other. when she gets a boyfriend i will be on the side as a guy she may talk to sometime but i wont be a priority in her life and it will kill me to see her with another guy. Im thinking i want to cut down on my contact with her and and have some space maybe.



Yeah,it's good to have some space to yourself.