so confused

[Coldstreak18]

I don't know how to describe this. I started dating this girl amanda about 2 weeks ago and I really like her whenever I'm with her I'm happy I can't wait to see her again. but when I'm not with her I doubts about how much i like her at times other times i feel happy. I don't understand why I can't just be happy with her. I dated one girl before named Brittany and I knew i liked her I never doubted it. The thing is I doubted whether she liked me and I was right. My relationship with the other girl wasn't even close to a relationship.

I always thought that when you dated someone you would always like them a certain amount and never go below that. I know that was stupid I know now that things can change that I'm not always going to feel the same way. that when I'm with her Ill feel different then when I'm not with her. but I can't get used to that idea i spent so long thinking the other way. I know how stupid that sounds and i feel like an idiot. I just can't figure out why i have this pit in my stomach about her. She is such a sweet girl and she is really pretty. We get along so well and I really like spending time with her. i just don't know why I can't get this pit out of my stomach when it comes to her at times. when I started typing this I had the pit now that I'm done and have thought about everything and how much she means to me I don't have the pit I'm happy and I'm glad I'm with her.

I don't understand why I feel like this. I know that i over think things a lot and I mean a lot. Do you think these feelings will fade over time as I get to know her better and we become closer?

[Coldstreak18]

I made a post about this a week ago and I forgot about it. Smackie9 said that my feelings were telling me that she wasn't the one and to move on. but I did the same thing when it came to my girlfriend before her its no longer a feeling that I don't like her its a feeling of i don't even know its just a pit in my stomach. I know that if i broke up with her and I dated some other girl I would feel the same way. I had the same exact problem with Brittany it just took me a while to realize it.

[Glow]

Its only been 2 weeks! Its okay to have doubts this early in the relationship. I remember when I first asked my bf out, I started to feel like I did the wrong thing. Like he wasnt the one I wanted, but I still felt something for him. I got over it, just told myself its my mind trying to mess with. I always put my heart over my mind, which is probably not the best idea, but Im not too dissatisfied with it. Heh. Give it some time. Wait a few months. Maybe one. You mihgt find yourself changing your mind.

Also, does she do anything that makes you want to doubt her? Is she shy around you? Does she not seem to be into you? Also, describe your feelings a bit more. The feelings about doubt I mean. Go more detailed. Like, what exactly are you thinking when you doubt your feelings?

[Howard]

So I guess you're not happy being with the girl you're with now? Is that it?

[Spaaron]

I get the idea where you are coming from, this type of feeling is confusing yes you start to doubt. I've had it before and i never really figured it out for myself but i guess it's more of a trust thing where you need something to reassure yourself to give you reason as to keep going with this girl you got. When i had my x-girlfriend i had the trouble of just trusting, i kept over thinking many things and i'd always want to go and see her and thats when i have that happiness and lust feeling. Your feeling could also be the idea that you just got her to easily or things are flowing along to simple and need something to create another spark for example having tension and arguements. Some people say arguements are healthy and are needed in all relationships, one without arguements are just to perfect or it just doesn't work out.

Your just missing something that you can't figure out basically, maybe you haven't got what you wanted yet and maybe your girlfriend isn't providing it for you at the moment and because of that you can't find that piece of the puzzle so you question and doubt yourself. Yes that is a possibility the feelings will fade as you get to know each other a lot more because you begin to discover feelings that will fit into place.

[Coldstreak18]

I think I know what it is now. I'm afraid of committing to her I'm a freshman in college and there are so many girls out there. The thing is I have always wanted a steady relationship and now that I have a girl that I know I can have that with I'm looking at all the other girls out there. I found myself doing it so often. I only had one girlfriend before this and I think in a way I'm afraid of getting hurt again which is stupid to be afraid of because its a part of life. I want a steady relationship I think should be done with someone who means something to you not a one night stand I have nothing against that its just not for me. but as the same time part of me wants to do. I really want to get over this and just be happy with Amanda. I know I would never be happy with one night stands.

I have a habit of never being just happy with what I have. If I broke up with Amanda I would be just as unhappy or even worse off. It kind of feels like I am settling. I think Amanda is really pretty but there are better girls there will always be better looking girls. I guess the secret is finding one you think is pretty that you love spending time with. We have are little disputes Ill say something stupid and she will get mad or vica versa. I see this as the end all that I'll probably never date again. I could easily see myself marrying her and I think that is whats scaring me. I have to learn to take it one step at a time not think about Amanda as the girl I'm going to marry its only been 2 weeks for gods sake. I have always been like this when I buy something I expect it to last a long long time. I guess the same goes for Amanda but now that I entered the relationship I expect to go well..... for ever. which is stupid because I'm young.

I have to learn to stop thinking about the future and take a step back and live in the present. I don't know how I'm going to do that but I have to or I'm going to sabotage every relationship I'll ever have until I learn to do that. I really have no idea how I am going to get over this but I have to figure out a way or I don't think I'll ever truly be happy.

Sorry I kinda figured it out myself. If anyone knows how to stop living in the future let me know.