PDA

View Full Version : keep or let her go?


Nedlam
03-04-2005, 02:36 AM
Hello ppls, i have come here as to ask on your opinions. I must say i am not good with words or expressing one's self.

My problem is within my GF. I will start at the begining. So put on the kettle and relax, we may be here a while.
Well, september we started seeing each other for , we liked each other a few months later. Knowing about it, she had been falling for a guy in India. They had been doing lot of late nights, chating cyber and phone chats and text. I met and i was okay, he was there i was here. So now the problem was she wanted him and had no time for me.
I walked out, she was upset as she relized what she was losing and wanted me back and he was to go. well this has happened again and now we have moved into my house, renting her house out to help with her income. She has decided that she no longer wants me as i treat her poor, which i found out was an excuse due to, the indian feller coming back

Well for xmas we renovated my house and we were happy, we decided that we'd settle down. But with my Thyroid (MEN type2) conditions, i get grumpy and i do get irritable. Its another problem in its self. but i did yell snap and i'm told i dont show romance, love or sweep her away enough like the Indian feller.

Well, the story at late, is, were 8 weeks preg. (due oct) i wasnt over the moon as i wanted to wait a little longer as we'd had problems and just got over the indian guy a few months ago. But i Knew the risk and decided she was the one i'd like to havea family with.
But now i'm told, she wants to go to india to meet him, but i still want her, the baby and be in a happy family settled down.
She will not bealowed to go with her 3yo daughter as the father may not agree, will have to terminate the pregnance as if meeting him preg, the parents will not agree.
Okay i do not see, romance due to me not showing, but i have never been romantic, i have tryed but always had it trown back in my face later. so i had given up on romance.
I do snap and he does sound sweet, with a romantic heart, but she has my baby and i have promised to look after her and give her, her needs. But she can not let him go and now i have told her that i will let her go and she and I will be friends. But share the same bed, cuddle and talk its still like a couple. She has no where to go, no spare rooms or beds.
I am lost to weather tell her to move on or keep on hoping it all will be fine and we can live together?

My big problem is she dosent show caring thoughts, for when i'm not well or need to see a specialest. Dont like family gatherings, which i have many off and miss lots due to. Spends all the free time on line to India, chatting or replying to off-line e-mails.

Please i ask you if theres some thing i can do? weather its for this relationship or another? I am lost and very depressed. I want to put this chapter to rest, but i know he's always going to be a problem and the sparks a dying.

What can i DO?
thanks in advance

Rich
03-04-2005, 01:03 PM
IMO your relationship with this girl will not last forever. Her feelings for you aren't that strong.

You should probably deal with the baby issue, end this relationship and get yourself together and healthy.

No woman is going to stay with you with the way that you treat them. Your condition ads to that but you still need to know when you're at a low point and refrain from doing anything to hurt the relationship. Gonna take a lot of will power on your part to control yourself.

All people want to be treated nicely and with respect. If you find yourself not being able to do that constantly, then you're in for a long road in regards to having any happy, loving or succesful relationships.

Rich

eightball61
03-05-2005, 01:26 PM
In your other post I expressed the issues with thyroids and it can trigger different personalities. This post explain more though than what was originally posted in the last thread. I do agree with Rich though and you need to spend time just fixing your issues and getting the proper treatment out of the way.

The way you both started your relationship just for started all the problems at the beginning. As we see they have carried on. Thats not the only issue here and there are several that we can go over but you main goal right now is YOU. YOU need to do things for yourself and try to get a few things corrected. Don't continue a just relationship anymore. IT will be hard to leave since I gather you both live together but you have to make a choice to whats healthy for YOU.