drpottz
03-09-2005, 03:37 AM
This subject has been bothering me more and more as as I've matured and had more experience with relationships.
It seems wherever I look in book stores, there's plenty of "Dating for Teens" books on the shelves. I was curious enough and checked out a couple to see what these authors had to offer. After reading some good portions out of these, I had quite a bit of mixed feelings. First off, I applaud the authors strive to make the point that guys need to respect the girl, and basically all in all, the need for having good morals when it comes to dating. Unfortunately, thats the about the extent that seemed helpful, or even true.
First off, I thought it was a complete joke the last one i read...."Dateable"....was writtin by a middle/older aged Nike shoe representative and her husband.....a probation officer. I don't even know where to start with that. What do ya think the probabtion officer is around all day to make all his assumptions in the book? Give me a break. Also, many books like these are writtin by authors that are considerably older than the teens now. Hasn't it occured to them that the times have changed incedibly?? When I say this girls, don't take it offensively (unless of course you fit in the category), but I get so frustrated when book after book pounds it in our head that guys and ONLY guys are the ones to blame.....because their lack of respect and need for "all of the time", no matter what guy. True, there's plenty of guys with no respect, but HELLO........have they not seen the way teen girls act/dress/ect this day in age???? What do you expect pre-teen guys to act like when they're brought up seeing/experiencing all of that crap in person and on TV/movies?? So many girls have zero respect for themselves or others now.....its pretty sad.
Now I know your probably thinking, I'm completely ist. Not at all, it's just that every book seems to constantly overgeneralize ALL the time about EVERYTHING with guys. "No matter what the guy, all they want is ." Now, by reading that, people can take that statement MANY different ways. The majority of readers would tend to take it as........"well if this is true, then guys just want one thing all the time and nothing else." Not even close. Yeah, no kidden guys want , I'd be lying if I said they didn't. But what the authors fail to do is REALLY expand off of that. I don't think I can ever recall reading any of them saying to the extent of..... there are still plenty of respectful guys that want more out of a dating relationship other than , with morals, and are willing to wait until marraige for the they want. Now I know there's plenty of guys not like that (me being part of the respectful type), but since the old probabtion officer author seems to think he knows what goes on in EVERY guys mind now days....i guess he must be right eh
This leads me to the idiot statements made in these books. One that seems to stick out is........"If a guy gives a girl a backrub, all he wants is ." Again, this came from the genius authors... the probation officer and the shoe rep. Enough said about that little statement. "Guys will do anything/give anything if they can get in return." Once again, a huge overgeneralization. Yeah no kidden, thats true about some........about many. What about the morally driven guys? Yep, they failed to give them any credit. I'm a totall believer in giving girls all the respect they deserve............deserve being the key word. I'm still oblivious why the books say its a must to give all girls the utmost respect. What about constant cheaters/liars/ect.???
Like I said in the begginning, there are some good statements/quotes/advice come out of these books, but the authors fail to explain alot of things that are overgeneralized, and many times, write things that just aren't even close with many guys. Yeah I know I'll get plenty of comments from guys harpin on me......but hey, I think plenty of you will agree with all of this.
Thanks for reading my article
It seems wherever I look in book stores, there's plenty of "Dating for Teens" books on the shelves. I was curious enough and checked out a couple to see what these authors had to offer. After reading some good portions out of these, I had quite a bit of mixed feelings. First off, I applaud the authors strive to make the point that guys need to respect the girl, and basically all in all, the need for having good morals when it comes to dating. Unfortunately, thats the about the extent that seemed helpful, or even true.
First off, I thought it was a complete joke the last one i read...."Dateable"....was writtin by a middle/older aged Nike shoe representative and her husband.....a probation officer. I don't even know where to start with that. What do ya think the probabtion officer is around all day to make all his assumptions in the book? Give me a break. Also, many books like these are writtin by authors that are considerably older than the teens now. Hasn't it occured to them that the times have changed incedibly?? When I say this girls, don't take it offensively (unless of course you fit in the category), but I get so frustrated when book after book pounds it in our head that guys and ONLY guys are the ones to blame.....because their lack of respect and need for "all of the time", no matter what guy. True, there's plenty of guys with no respect, but HELLO........have they not seen the way teen girls act/dress/ect this day in age???? What do you expect pre-teen guys to act like when they're brought up seeing/experiencing all of that crap in person and on TV/movies?? So many girls have zero respect for themselves or others now.....its pretty sad.
Now I know your probably thinking, I'm completely ist. Not at all, it's just that every book seems to constantly overgeneralize ALL the time about EVERYTHING with guys. "No matter what the guy, all they want is ." Now, by reading that, people can take that statement MANY different ways. The majority of readers would tend to take it as........"well if this is true, then guys just want one thing all the time and nothing else." Not even close. Yeah, no kidden guys want , I'd be lying if I said they didn't. But what the authors fail to do is REALLY expand off of that. I don't think I can ever recall reading any of them saying to the extent of..... there are still plenty of respectful guys that want more out of a dating relationship other than , with morals, and are willing to wait until marraige for the they want. Now I know there's plenty of guys not like that (me being part of the respectful type), but since the old probabtion officer author seems to think he knows what goes on in EVERY guys mind now days....i guess he must be right eh
This leads me to the idiot statements made in these books. One that seems to stick out is........"If a guy gives a girl a backrub, all he wants is ." Again, this came from the genius authors... the probation officer and the shoe rep. Enough said about that little statement. "Guys will do anything/give anything if they can get in return." Once again, a huge overgeneralization. Yeah no kidden, thats true about some........about many. What about the morally driven guys? Yep, they failed to give them any credit. I'm a totall believer in giving girls all the respect they deserve............deserve being the key word. I'm still oblivious why the books say its a must to give all girls the utmost respect. What about constant cheaters/liars/ect.???
Like I said in the begginning, there are some good statements/quotes/advice come out of these books, but the authors fail to explain alot of things that are overgeneralized, and many times, write things that just aren't even close with many guys. Yeah I know I'll get plenty of comments from guys harpin on me......but hey, I think plenty of you will agree with all of this.
Thanks for reading my article