It feels like a Witch hunt!

[MalahFae]

I met my fiance online a year ago now. We first became friends, but quickly there after, fell in love. He lived across the country and came out to visit me this past may, engagment ring on hand (though he didnt pop the question right away). We spent an amazing two weeks together during which time he met the most important people in my family. Everyone really loved him...esp my favorite Aunt. After our two weeks together were up he flew home to get things together in his life out there so he could move here to be w me and the entire time he was gone i was asked about him and told to send the love of family members to him when we talked. After a long and rough 6 weeks he came back for good and it has been great. Just recently we finally got our very own apartment. On the day we move in my aunt told me she had been having "feelings" about things to come. this wasnt odd to me as such things tend to run in the family, however she said these were very bad feelings and basically began warning me that my future husband who she once adored was now going to become controlling and attempt to cut me off from my family. Mind you, this is ALL based on a feeling and not on any observed treatment. (He treats me wonderfully). As if this isnt bad enough through my upset i have talked to other people i am close to, only to find that she has told all of the closest people to me about these feelings and even gone so far as to request another family memeber attempt to do a background check on him. He is not controlling, he has never hurt me nor has he displayed any signs that would perhaps foretell such a thing happening in the future. To be perfectly honest, im the bossy on in the relationship (HAHAHA). The whole thing is getting out of hand and it is beginning to feel like they decided to dislike my fiance for no reason at all. (She has only seen him 3 times since he came home, one of which was the day she told me about the feelings)

Does anyone have any advice on how to handle this? Id really appreciate any input. thank you.

[eightball61]

WOW:rolleyes: I don't think I have any real advice except you know this guy better than anyone else. Maybe she is right or maybe she is wrong and we'll never know that until time goes on. Your family seems very close and I can understand why things would get out of hand when one talks but again this is about you and not them. Of course, you're going to be on high alert now so try not to allow this to ruin things. He's been great so far to charish what you have in hand so you don't lose it.

[Diablo]

Now seems like a hell of a time for relatives to be doing something like this. This happens to a lot of people. Just try to ignore it as best you can. You're noit under 18, so no one can force you not to marry him. So don't worry about it. It's going to be aggravating, but if things work with him, your aunt will back off. If it ends badly, you'll be hearing "I told you so" for a while.

[PrincessB]

I come from a large invasive family myself and I think I might know what you're talking about. My advice is to heed her warning and watch for red flags. Other than that its none of her or anybody else's business unless you are in danger. If your acknowledgment of her concerns isn't enough to satisfy her then I would limit contact to special occasions if its really out of hand. Advise anybody else that brings it up that unless they can offer specific examples of concerning behavior to respectfully mind their own business.