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View Full Version : Fiancee is still in lvoe with Ex


Caecaecae
08-21-2009, 09:27 PM
When me and my fiancee got together she stopped seeing her Ex.

Two years later she admits that she still has feelings for him. She wants to go to his house for parties, and stay there as late as she wants without me getting upset. She's kissed him recently, but says she does not think she was cheating on me and I forgave her. She gets upset saying I don't give her enough space in the relationship every time I question her about her relationships with other men.

Last time she was at a party at his house she was alone in his room with him. Where he asked her to kiss him. She said nothing happened, but lied to me about being alone in his room.

She says she wants to be with me but still be able to date other people. But not have to sleep with them, and have other boyfriends, but still be able to come to bed with me every night.

She often gets angry, yells, and hits me, I never hit her back. She accuses me of trying to help her sort out her life to much, and compares me to her Ex. She has pages and pages of poetry about her ex (which i'm not meant to have read) where she says how much she longs for him, and wants to have with him, and how all the most important gifts she's brought me she was hoping she could buy for him.

She has stopped wearing her engagement ring, and only puts it on now when she doesn't want people to ask questions.

What's everyones opinion on the situation? SHould I give her more space, leave her?

eightball61
08-24-2009, 12:44 PM
Just run as fast as you can before you get suckered as the leftovers.

Mozez Manduu
08-25-2009, 09:25 PM
The obvious response is: The woman's no good. However... that remains to be seen. The question isn't 'Is she good...' the question is; "Is She Good for You?" A relationship isn't define by a single definition. A relationship is defined by two people in agreement with what they are both seeking. It sounds to me like she is being very direct and very honest with what she wants from you. So, my question to you is: Are you being Direct and Honest with her, as to what you expect from her?

If one, or both of you are unwilling to give to the other what they are seeking, then there is no relationship. I've often heard that a good man doesn't run the streets. And yet, if you find a man running the streets (with his lady) she will tell you he's the Greatest Man in the World. What this means is: What is good for one person, isn't necessarily good for everyone.

The point is: You know exactly what she expects from you, as her Man, Fiancee, etc.; So is that what you are looking for? If Yes... then go be happy... if No, then go find someone who makes you happy. Because if you change her, to be what you want her to be, she will one day resent you for it. If you allow her to change You, you will one day resent her for it.

And lastly... and most importantly; You may want to considered doing a bit of Self-Evaluation. In your post, you've stated that she wants to DATE other men, Go Out with Other Men, not where her engagement ring, Kiss other men, etc... ... and you are unsure what to do. Usually, this is Not okay with people; though in some cases, other people don't have a problem with it. If you don't know whether or not you like this type of relationship, then you may wish to spend a little time trying to determine what it is you are seeking from a woman. And then, find the woman who compliments those thoughts.

smackie9
08-26-2009, 12:50 AM
YES! Dump her sorry ass and stop being her doormat! what a beyotch!