bdtraders
03-12-2005, 08:58 PM
Well as you have read from my previous posts me and my GF have had our ups and downs. Last night and today have been one real rollercoaster ride. Last night me and my mom got into over something stupid. My mom told me I was just acting moody because my " of a girlfriend" was there. That made it worse and me and my mom exchanged insults the next 15 mins. Me and my mom made up and she apologized to my GF (its been a year and my mom wants nothing to do with her). My GF was upset and so was I because that talk was uncalled for by my mom, especially in front of my GFs kids. We drove home and i could tell she was bothered (rightfully so) When we went to bed I apologized for my mothers actions and told her it was uncalled for and told her i was on her side. I told her that she never has to deal with her again, but i would request she would go to my Grandmothers funeral when it happens. (shes in the hospital dieing of congestive heart faliure). She sais she didnt know, because she didnt want to be in a situation like that again. I said i understand but a funeral i would like her to be there for me. She said she would see, i told her we would avoid mom. She said we would see.
The rest of the night she avoided me, locking herself in the bathroom alot and when we went to bed she rolled over and tottaly ignored me. I asked her why is she mad at me, and she said she wasnt, i said then why is it for as long as i can remember that anytime nothings worng you fall asleep near me and place your hand on my chest, she got pissed off, rolled over and slammed her hand down on my chest.
This am we got up and she joked with kids and the pets and when i said something it was just YES or NO answers. We went to her sons ballgame and she avoided me there. I walked to go move my truck closer and when ig ot back she was all pissed off cause she said she had been calling me. I told her I didnt hear her, and she said Bullsh** everyone heard me except you. I told her i was zoning becuse of last night and the fact that she was avoiding me today. she laughed and said "whatever were done" That through me for a loop. I asked what and she said we are done. I said why and she said cause we cant get along. I walked away and her sister told me to relax that her sister (my GF) wasnt being reasonable. About 20 mins later i approached her again and asked her if she trully wanted to end things and why, she said yea dont you, i said no we have been having some really good times lately. She said she wasnt gonna come between me and my mom and i told her that she is my family now that is why i gave her a ring last sunday. She said whatever were done. I walked off leaving her sister there to talk to her. I went out to my truck and she had left her purse in it, so i walked back to her and gave her her purse and she took off the ring i gave her and handed it to me. That killed me, i burst into tears right there and walked off. Her sister came and talked to me and told me not to go anywhere and to give her the ring, she went and talked to my GF and then said my GF would come talk to me in 5 minutes. My GF walked over and said " what do you want". I was like, "You" she said its not gonna work out so why fight it. I said ok i cant argue and walked away.
When we got home i walked into the garage and she was there and she aske dme why i disrespected her in front of her friends. I told her i didnt hear her and i was trully sorry i was zoning out about all the recent events that are hapineing in my life. I asked her if she trully loved me and she got mad saying "yes why do you question that" I said becuase you took the ring off that i gave you on sunday and handed back to me and its still in my pocket. She got mad and said fine give it to me, and put it back on her finger. I asked her why she couldnt look at me while we talked and she said cause she felt bad for hurting me and i deserve better then a person like her so why dont i leave. i told her cause I love her and i see the good in her. She never cryed once about this today while i balled like a little girl, even had to sit down on the floor at one point cause i felt dizzy and had chest pains. She had to go to work , and told me she loved me and that I should be ok, I told her i wasnt sure anymore how she felt about me after she gave me the ring today and seh said shes sorry she hurt me. She left for work and I called to tell her about a road closure near our house. She seemed all pissed off so i let her go. I dont plan to call her today while shes at work, and its like if i call her i feel as though i gave in to her control game, but if i dont call her then seh gets mad and tells me i dont care. I dont know what to do, I love her with all my heart, and she claims to everyone (sometimes even me on good days) how much she loves me. Shes been bragging to everyone about her ring i gave her, but today she was so quick to giv eit back and say we were done, im scared now that she relly dosent love me. I dont know what to think. She said that she gave me the ring back cause she was mad and upset and people do dumb things when they are mad, well if she realized it was wrong adn stupid why didnt she ask for it back. Shes the type that will let herself fail then admit being wrong sometimes, even in regards to us. Her sister told me that my GF will say something seh wont mean like she did today, but WILL NOT try to fix it when seh relizes the mistake was made, she would rather be alone then make up.
What do I do, I love her and the kids, but i am trully lost now. Does she really love me or was that a sign that our relationship is nothing to her?
Sorry this was so long, i coud really use some help.
The rest of the night she avoided me, locking herself in the bathroom alot and when we went to bed she rolled over and tottaly ignored me. I asked her why is she mad at me, and she said she wasnt, i said then why is it for as long as i can remember that anytime nothings worng you fall asleep near me and place your hand on my chest, she got pissed off, rolled over and slammed her hand down on my chest.
This am we got up and she joked with kids and the pets and when i said something it was just YES or NO answers. We went to her sons ballgame and she avoided me there. I walked to go move my truck closer and when ig ot back she was all pissed off cause she said she had been calling me. I told her I didnt hear her, and she said Bullsh** everyone heard me except you. I told her i was zoning becuse of last night and the fact that she was avoiding me today. she laughed and said "whatever were done" That through me for a loop. I asked what and she said we are done. I said why and she said cause we cant get along. I walked away and her sister told me to relax that her sister (my GF) wasnt being reasonable. About 20 mins later i approached her again and asked her if she trully wanted to end things and why, she said yea dont you, i said no we have been having some really good times lately. She said she wasnt gonna come between me and my mom and i told her that she is my family now that is why i gave her a ring last sunday. She said whatever were done. I walked off leaving her sister there to talk to her. I went out to my truck and she had left her purse in it, so i walked back to her and gave her her purse and she took off the ring i gave her and handed it to me. That killed me, i burst into tears right there and walked off. Her sister came and talked to me and told me not to go anywhere and to give her the ring, she went and talked to my GF and then said my GF would come talk to me in 5 minutes. My GF walked over and said " what do you want". I was like, "You" she said its not gonna work out so why fight it. I said ok i cant argue and walked away.
When we got home i walked into the garage and she was there and she aske dme why i disrespected her in front of her friends. I told her i didnt hear her and i was trully sorry i was zoning out about all the recent events that are hapineing in my life. I asked her if she trully loved me and she got mad saying "yes why do you question that" I said becuase you took the ring off that i gave you on sunday and handed back to me and its still in my pocket. She got mad and said fine give it to me, and put it back on her finger. I asked her why she couldnt look at me while we talked and she said cause she felt bad for hurting me and i deserve better then a person like her so why dont i leave. i told her cause I love her and i see the good in her. She never cryed once about this today while i balled like a little girl, even had to sit down on the floor at one point cause i felt dizzy and had chest pains. She had to go to work , and told me she loved me and that I should be ok, I told her i wasnt sure anymore how she felt about me after she gave me the ring today and seh said shes sorry she hurt me. She left for work and I called to tell her about a road closure near our house. She seemed all pissed off so i let her go. I dont plan to call her today while shes at work, and its like if i call her i feel as though i gave in to her control game, but if i dont call her then seh gets mad and tells me i dont care. I dont know what to do, I love her with all my heart, and she claims to everyone (sometimes even me on good days) how much she loves me. Shes been bragging to everyone about her ring i gave her, but today she was so quick to giv eit back and say we were done, im scared now that she relly dosent love me. I dont know what to think. She said that she gave me the ring back cause she was mad and upset and people do dumb things when they are mad, well if she realized it was wrong adn stupid why didnt she ask for it back. Shes the type that will let herself fail then admit being wrong sometimes, even in regards to us. Her sister told me that my GF will say something seh wont mean like she did today, but WILL NOT try to fix it when seh relizes the mistake was made, she would rather be alone then make up.
What do I do, I love her and the kids, but i am trully lost now. Does she really love me or was that a sign that our relationship is nothing to her?
Sorry this was so long, i coud really use some help.