fishy28
09-21-2009, 02:09 AM
My boyfriend and I have been dating seriously for almost a year and a half. We have a great relationship in that we have very good communication, we both adore each other, and I trust him completely, and he trusts me as well. However, has mainly been quite infrequent since the beginning of our relationship. Since I have relatively low drive myself, I didn't really notice it in the beginning and I didn't really mind. However, it is concerning me now as more of a health issue than anything else as am wondering if the fact that he is: a) 20 pounds overweight, b) a VERY heavy smoker, c) he enjoys drinking a LOT (he is not an alcoholic, and hardly ever gets drunk but drinks frequently and because he has a high tolerance he will often have 4 drinks at a time whenever he goes out, which is at least twice or three times a week), d) has a VERY stressful job and works DAILY about 10-11 hours has something to do with this. We have about once or twice a month, but the interesting thing is that if we're on vacation, we have almost every day, so I'm wondering if his "lifestyle" including his stress level due to his job has more to do w/ the low drive than anything else. I'm concerned both for his health though and our relationship--lately, he seems to have no interest in and even if we start trying to have he loses interest. As I said, while I'm a person w/ a lower than average drive in my opinion, this is beginning to bother me. Please note that I am sure he's not cheating on me, and as I said in all other ways we have a wonderful relationship. However, I'm feeling very sad about this and don't know what to do exactly. I'm trying to get him to lead a healthier lifestyle, and he's told me he's trying, but so far it seems to be a very slow process w/ all the bad habits that he has.
I would appreciate any constructive advice.
Thank you.
I would appreciate any constructive advice.
Thank you.