Not Sure What to Do

[krad8]

So my exgirlfriend and I were dating for about 5.5 years and we started fighting a lot and i started getting lazy and last March we decided to take a break. After this initial break, I was hurting a lot and lost some weight and had trouble sleeping a lot. It hit me that she means everything to me and i could have handled things a little different. And I would try different ways to try and get her back and prove to her but I think she just wanted some space and towards the end of july we talked about it again and she thought we should completely break up because she didn't think it would work right and she told me it might work in the future but not right now because she didn't love me as a BF but just as a friend.
Middle of September rolls around and she had asked me to go on her company fishing trip that I have done with her like 3 times before and I told her that I didn't think it was a good idea. Well, this made her a little upset and she said that if I'm not going to try then she doesnt want it to work either. So anyway we got to talking on the phone and texted about the relationship and she texted to me, "eventually i do think we will be together again. thats what i tell everyone. i dont know when that is going to be and i dont know if there is anything you can do to speed it up or slow it down." and I dont think i really responded to that other than ok and what not. she also told me that her guy friends have been acting different towards her and like want to be with her and she doesnt like this and i could tell that she was kinda upset about it. well this kinda made me feel good because i knew that i meant something to her and it sounded like she just needed more time. I just feel like im being put in a tough situation. tell me that youll be with eventually but not give me a time frame or anything and it could be awhile. i know she is busy with some stuff and im not going to say what it is here but idk. i guess im just wondering if i should just wait it out? Im leaning towards waiting it out with her because she really does mean everything to me. but its hard know that i will have to wait months. I think its just kind of unfair to me to say that stuff to me. does anyone have any advice or been thourhg something similar?

[eightball61]

She told you once that she doesn't think it will work but then gets upset when you back off because of some company outing. You were just reacting to her voice. That's her blame and not yours.

You are in a tough position because you are playing follow the leader with her but how long can you follow???? It's ok to try to hang on but at the same time you can't put your life on hold for her. She made it clear once and you need to bring this up to why you backed off. If my view if she really wanted to try to work things out then she would try a little harder.

I'm guessing this company outing she didn't have anyone to bring while others did and by you saying got her upset because she didn't want to show them she was alone and signle. If this was "just" an image attempt that was very shallow of her. I'd tread lightly on this one and try to move on.

[krad8]

Yea. I care about her more than anything and we spent a lot of time together maturing into adults for 5.5 years but i feel like she is just leading me on. Its been a couple months since we have been broken up but now when she asked me to go on a fishing trip and i say no, it made her upset. basically what she told me is that eventually we will be together. she doesnt know how long or if anything would speed that up. but to me that amount of time could be months and idk if she thinks im just going to hang out with her during this time. she needs to realize that im not going to just put my life on hold like you said.

[eightball61]

You know we all could sit her and make a million excuses to why she wanted to breakup but what really boils down here is that she wanted a break so now you need to give her the break she asked for. You not going on the trip was a great start so now when you both talk you need to cool down the conversations about future relationships. Only allow her to bring it up and if she ask why you don't talk about it then simple say you are going by what she requested.

Also this is your time now too. I understand you care a lot for her but while she's doing whatever she needed to get done for a breakup you need to try to move on as well and in the end if you both end up together great but if not then at least you won't come back here angry that you wasted all that time waiitng.