Losing it!!!

[burleson]

I am so pissed right now. My boyfriend, who I love dearly, is never home in the first place because he's a foreman of a roofing company, so he's ALWAYS working. And when he is home, he doesn't help me do shit and he sleeps all the damn time. We have a 1 1/2 year old and I'm baseically a single mother. I work full time also, so when I have to do everything at home too with no help, it highly pisses me off. It's no use talking to him because it goes in one ear and out the other. I love him so much but I really feel like I'm gonna blow up soon.

[bdtraders]

My question to you is then why do you do it? I know you love him, but make him do his own laundry. Cook his own meals, etc. Just worry about yourself and your child, he will come around and if he gets upset tell him that you need his help. If he dosent want to help then tell him thats fine you will leave and he will pay you child support. Also let them know that just because he got you pregnant dosent mean hes the father of the child. A childs father is a man that participates in the childs life, right now it sounds like he was a donor.
Bottom line is do whats best for you and the child. Worry about you and your child first before him. Hes a grown man he can fend for himself. When he chooses to be a part of the family again then you will choose to trerat him like one.

[burleson]

Yea, I was just doing chores and I said to myself, "You know what, he can wash his own damn clothes and dishes and he can cook his on dinner. I'm not doing anything else for him until he shows me a little respect and consideration. He may work hard at his job and get stressed and tired, but I'm working 3 full time jobs taking care of a kid and him plus my real full time job. I'm sick of it, I'm not doing his shit anymore.

[bdtraders]

Exactly, just because you choose to look out for yourself and your child and make him carry his own weight around the house does not mean that you love him any less, it just means that you love yourself and your child more, and that is how it should be. Some call it selfish, but others call it healthy. How can you possibly love anyone if you dont first love yourself. How can you possibly provide for your family (him and child) if you are burnt out and exhausted.
You did the right thing, he will come around and if he dosent, dont fret another "real man" will.
Good luck and god bless.

[eightball61]

I could suggest you make a list of activities and you do your share each week and he does his but that may nto work....then again it's still something to think about. What you need to do is make a stand for yourself. If you consider yourself a single mother then be one...what I mean is you only make meals for yourself and the child, leave his laundry alone, but only hygien stuff for you or the child, ect. This routine will still be fustrating because it will cause fights but at least it may get through to him that you give up and you are giing him on last chance to save the relationship.

This is the year 2005, and its where both partners work. He may work a few more hours than you and may be tired but if he wants a home and family life then he needs to act like that father figure. If he can't give that to you then I can introduce you to a few men that can help you out better than he :) Basically you just need to make a stand.