Broke Up

[Cuna84]

Hi all, hopefully some of you have some words of wisdom for me as I am feeling very lost at the moment. To cut a long story short I split up from my gf of 19 months last Wednesday evening and whilst I was relatively fine that night and in intermittent periods since then in general have been feeling completely empty. I was the person ending the relationship as I thought that we had had so many up and downs over that time and were never completely settled during the last year or so of the relationship and we had a brief separation in February (again initiated by me but she took me back when I thought I had made the wrong choice to end things) but despite this we still had some fantastic times. However in the last 2 weeks or so we had been up and down a lot and having some probs and last Wednesday I ended things. Since then I have felt awful to be honest and that I have let her down and maybe I could have done things differently. Part of the reason we broke up was due to the fact we are at university and whilst we were having our ups and downs I was thinking, what if we get through Uni and decide we weren't right for each other, the chance to meet so many new people at Uni would have gone. But at the moment I am thinking I let that thought overwhelm me and maybe consume our relationship. I know that if I feel in a month or twos time that this was the wrong decision again that I will in all likelihood not be getting taken back but at the moment I feel like I have thrown something away, I have lost my soulmate my confident and my love. To put in laymens terms, I loved and still love her but I was doubting whether she was the one and for that reason I ended things. Now she is dropping my things off today and said I will just put stuff through letterbox since none of it meant anything to you which is completely untrue and I wish she knew that but I know that by contacting her it would be the worst thing to do. I know I probably don't deserve as much sympathy since I was the person doing the dumping but by god it hurts at the moment.

[smackie9]

Who said ending a relationship would have you dancing for joy? You are going through a grieving process. A loss of a relationship is like dealing with a death. It takes time to heal. Of course you will have doubts, but there were good reasons why you have come to this decision to end it. It's just not working out. The only thing you would be throwing away is the opportunity to be in a better relationship. You just need to let go, try to not get sucked back in to your comfort zone to be with her again. Be strong, the pain will be off you in about a few weeks if you really let it.