claire07
12-22-2009, 11:23 PM
Right basically i need some help here as I’m very confused,
I have been best friends with this girl for 5 years and iv always felt a different connection than my other friends. We’ve both had boyfriends in the past that have ended up nightmares.
So this year we become close, partly because we haven’t had boyfriends and most of our friends have boyfriends so we hang out a lot.
Over the summer she started acting really strange, I had come across a few things on her laptop on forums about loving your best friend and straight girl mind games and replies on there telling you to distance yourself. And she was making excuses not to see me or even speak on the phone, and when we would end up seeing each other she got really stressy and snappy for no reason. It got to a point where i thought im not wasting my time anymore and i dunno what her problem was and so i said i wont bother with u anymore. She had replied “good i had been trying to avoid you for a long time but it was very difficult” even though i had only been my usual self. I didn’t question why as she is quite closed up. I left her to it and after a few days she started acting normal again, making extra efforts to see me, the stressyness stayed for a while. I had realised i had started developing feelings for her but just brushed them off.
Then we became closer and seen each other everyday and it was getting worse for me that i thought eventually im going to have to say something before it kills me building up inside. So one night after a few drinks i told her in a subtle way that i think i loved her and she simply replied “i know” and grabbed my hand..and then we kissed for a few seconds.
The next day there was no awkwardness and a day later we discussed what had happened. I had said it was bad and it wont happen again and so she agreed. Even though she seemed to be ringing and wanting to meet me more which i was supprised about.
I assumed she wasn’t interested as she didn’t say anything back to me that night and agreed when i said it wouldn’t happen again. Then a few weeks later it happened again twice except kissing for almost half an hour. We agreed it comes in threes and no more.
But then ever since for a month it keeps happening everytime we drink and go to sleep (which is usually 3 times a week)
She sometimes initiates it and sometimes we end up staying up for hours till a ridiculous hour kissing/and touching. We went away for the weekend just the two of us and she took things abit further by making a move down below and i freaked out and so she didn’t try it again.
So im confused as to, is she just using me as an experiment? Does she have feelings but cant tell me them in case things becomes too serious and she cant handle emotion because she’s closed up? She has said the word love she cant pronounce so maybe that’s why? Can it ruin a friendship?
A few suggestions on the situation would be great if u can offer any advice on it?
I have been best friends with this girl for 5 years and iv always felt a different connection than my other friends. We’ve both had boyfriends in the past that have ended up nightmares.
So this year we become close, partly because we haven’t had boyfriends and most of our friends have boyfriends so we hang out a lot.
Over the summer she started acting really strange, I had come across a few things on her laptop on forums about loving your best friend and straight girl mind games and replies on there telling you to distance yourself. And she was making excuses not to see me or even speak on the phone, and when we would end up seeing each other she got really stressy and snappy for no reason. It got to a point where i thought im not wasting my time anymore and i dunno what her problem was and so i said i wont bother with u anymore. She had replied “good i had been trying to avoid you for a long time but it was very difficult” even though i had only been my usual self. I didn’t question why as she is quite closed up. I left her to it and after a few days she started acting normal again, making extra efforts to see me, the stressyness stayed for a while. I had realised i had started developing feelings for her but just brushed them off.
Then we became closer and seen each other everyday and it was getting worse for me that i thought eventually im going to have to say something before it kills me building up inside. So one night after a few drinks i told her in a subtle way that i think i loved her and she simply replied “i know” and grabbed my hand..and then we kissed for a few seconds.
The next day there was no awkwardness and a day later we discussed what had happened. I had said it was bad and it wont happen again and so she agreed. Even though she seemed to be ringing and wanting to meet me more which i was supprised about.
I assumed she wasn’t interested as she didn’t say anything back to me that night and agreed when i said it wouldn’t happen again. Then a few weeks later it happened again twice except kissing for almost half an hour. We agreed it comes in threes and no more.
But then ever since for a month it keeps happening everytime we drink and go to sleep (which is usually 3 times a week)
She sometimes initiates it and sometimes we end up staying up for hours till a ridiculous hour kissing/and touching. We went away for the weekend just the two of us and she took things abit further by making a move down below and i freaked out and so she didn’t try it again.
So im confused as to, is she just using me as an experiment? Does she have feelings but cant tell me them in case things becomes too serious and she cant handle emotion because she’s closed up? She has said the word love she cant pronounce so maybe that’s why? Can it ruin a friendship?
A few suggestions on the situation would be great if u can offer any advice on it?