2dazedn2confuse
03-20-2010, 06:55 PM
So, here's how it is. I've been friends with this guy since my freshman year of highschool. I'm 20 now. I originally met him because my friend and I were both cruching on him hard and I approached him one day. It turned out he was friends with all of my friends so, slowly, over time, we became closer. After high school we were always together. Day and night, before work and after work. He had a gf when we first started to really hang out every day but she was mad jealous of me and the time he and I spent together and eventually they broke it off. We kept chilling like this and everyone- all of ours friends and our family...even me- thought we were it. We were going to end up together. Obviously that's not how it happened. I know we both had feelings for each other when we were chilling like that- he told me and I told him, but we waited too long. We both thought the other wasn't feeling that way- that it was silly to even think that we were both feeling each other.
Evenutally he started dating a new girl and, immediately after this, I pushed all of my feelings for him to the side and started dating a really great guy. Problem was, this new boyfriend wasn't who I really wanted (this was about 2 years ago).
We really lost touch after this and it was horrible. I felt like (and have recently told him this) I lost the other half of myself. We barely spoke for over a year.
He and his new girl dated for a while but it didn't work. I dated my new guy for about the same amount of time with the same results.
We started talking more after our break ups. It wasn't like before though- it was only occasional.
About a year ago we both started seeing new people.
We started to hang out again, more and more, around that time. A few months ago he broke it off with his lady and came to me immediately.
Now, things are getting crazy. I still have very strong feelings for him, seven years later, and he's honestly confusing the crap out of me.
I know that my current interest and I aren't going to make it because of how stroy feelings are for my friend. I can't lead him on, so I'm ending it.
But here's the real issue. I don't know what to think about my friend.
We hang out more and more every day. He always asks to hang out but just us. Just me and him. I have the best time of my life with him. We went out recently and spent the day together hiking and driving around just talking. That night we stayed up talking until we passed out. It was probably the best night I've had in years.
We went out after that later and he took me around town, climbing trees, showing me his favorite spots to sit and think, and brought me to a party. We stayed out until 4 in the morning and I gave him and a mutual friend a ride home. iafter I dropped him off and said goodnight he sent me a text saying how he's happy that we're rekindling our relationship and he was hopinh that we could spend another night together talking until we passed out again. He said it was the best night. I agreed with him, and we made plans to sit and star gaze and just talk all night on the next clear night.
When I look at him, its like I can't tare my eyes away. We both catch each other staring at one another and its likr when we lock eyes we completely understand what the other is thinking.
Whenever I think about getting a hold of him he always, always calls or texts before I get a chance to. Its like he just knows when I need him. Its kind of crazy.
So basically, my question is, am I reading way too much into this? Should I just snub these feelings I've had for this guy, my best friend, for years and come to terms with the fact that friends are just that- friends. Or do you think I should risk what we have now and go for what I've wanted all of this time?
I don't want to loose him. I'm afraid telling him how I feel will put him off if its not mutual and id rather have him in my life as a friend if nothing else. What do I do?
Evenutally he started dating a new girl and, immediately after this, I pushed all of my feelings for him to the side and started dating a really great guy. Problem was, this new boyfriend wasn't who I really wanted (this was about 2 years ago).
We really lost touch after this and it was horrible. I felt like (and have recently told him this) I lost the other half of myself. We barely spoke for over a year.
He and his new girl dated for a while but it didn't work. I dated my new guy for about the same amount of time with the same results.
We started talking more after our break ups. It wasn't like before though- it was only occasional.
About a year ago we both started seeing new people.
We started to hang out again, more and more, around that time. A few months ago he broke it off with his lady and came to me immediately.
Now, things are getting crazy. I still have very strong feelings for him, seven years later, and he's honestly confusing the crap out of me.
I know that my current interest and I aren't going to make it because of how stroy feelings are for my friend. I can't lead him on, so I'm ending it.
But here's the real issue. I don't know what to think about my friend.
We hang out more and more every day. He always asks to hang out but just us. Just me and him. I have the best time of my life with him. We went out recently and spent the day together hiking and driving around just talking. That night we stayed up talking until we passed out. It was probably the best night I've had in years.
We went out after that later and he took me around town, climbing trees, showing me his favorite spots to sit and think, and brought me to a party. We stayed out until 4 in the morning and I gave him and a mutual friend a ride home. iafter I dropped him off and said goodnight he sent me a text saying how he's happy that we're rekindling our relationship and he was hopinh that we could spend another night together talking until we passed out again. He said it was the best night. I agreed with him, and we made plans to sit and star gaze and just talk all night on the next clear night.
When I look at him, its like I can't tare my eyes away. We both catch each other staring at one another and its likr when we lock eyes we completely understand what the other is thinking.
Whenever I think about getting a hold of him he always, always calls or texts before I get a chance to. Its like he just knows when I need him. Its kind of crazy.
So basically, my question is, am I reading way too much into this? Should I just snub these feelings I've had for this guy, my best friend, for years and come to terms with the fact that friends are just that- friends. Or do you think I should risk what we have now and go for what I've wanted all of this time?
I don't want to loose him. I'm afraid telling him how I feel will put him off if its not mutual and id rather have him in my life as a friend if nothing else. What do I do?