Viperpiper
05-18-2010, 09:45 PM
Hello everyone... im feeling pretty lost and hurt right now and need some help and guidance
I made a post here years ago concerning a girl that broke up with me.... well we got back togetehr in the near future but really it was long distance game that was played for 16 months
i dont wanna write a 5000 word essay... nobody will read it so ill try my best keep it brief and hopfully everyone will get an understanding
I was 18 fresh out of high school... never had a girlfriend i went off to University and lived on my own for the first time, I meet my girlfriend on the first day of school. on the bus we compared classes and saw we had one. we began to hang out and as the semester progressed we became best friends. she had a boyfriend the entire time but in a different city, the semester began in September and we fell in love within weeks, just before Christmas she broke up with her boyfriend, i went home to my parents house in a different city for Christmas but then we got together for new years and began our relationship.
We dated for 2 years and in Novemeber she one night said to me that she was going home to her parents house after she was finished school, and she was done in december right before christmas. I was heart broken because i thought she was the one, i thought she was the most beautiful girl in the world and not a day went by that i ever thought differently. long story short she broke up with me and went home to where her parents were and were she grew up. we stayed in contact did tones of talking rollercoaster emotionally.. then she called me one day saying i miss you and i want "us" again. We got back together and then did a long distance relationship for 16 months. Seeing eachother back and forth once a month sometimes less for 4-5 days.(weekends & holidays etc)
Now heres what happend this weekend. Last week she called me one night and said i really miss you and you need to come out and see me, i really want to talk to you about being together and the possibility of me moving out to be with you. so i was like ok............. and went out to see her excited and interested to see if we could finally have a resolution. Well i went out and things went wonderful the first few days and i felt like things were just as new (in love) doing romantic amazing stuff!
THEN BOOM! flipped a switch... sits down with me the night before i leave and "im done" "i cant do long distance anymore" im "emotionally exhausted" and youve been my safety net for the past year..... were going in different directions and were apart.... this needs to end! says to me "i need to figure out me" something i thought i did after i moved away back home here from you.(when we broke up the first time) but ive been lying to myself and trying with every i have to convince myself ive fixed my problems... but i havent and with you in the picture i just can never fix them and all ill do is continue hurting you"
So i was ultimately shocked by this came out of nowhere i realized the long distance was tough but i thought we were managing with a sight of reconnecting sometime in the fall(the idea i thought was going to be presented to me when i travelled out there to see her.
So she cried all night.... and more in the morning..... never in 3.5 years have i see her cry so much yet she broke up with me.... and so i get driven to the airport but her mom she wasnt in any state to drive. I said goodbye and that was that............. i left! im back home and havent made any contact and its been really tough trying to understand what the hell just happend this past weekend!
Get invited out there lovingly and then out of nowhere she just wakes up a different person and thats it! 3.5 years pooof gone and she was the girl i wanted to marry since day 1........... my first my only!
Now i feel lost and just dont know what to do... she made me feel like i existed, had a purpose, the only girl to love me!
I cant understand what just happened, i just dont get it! how someone can go from "come out and see me i want to be with you again(no more longdistance) to goodbye i cant continue hurting you and were done!
I think she is bipolar and its been untreated for a very long time... all throughout the relationship it was hot and cold.... but now it just crossed the line......... 1 minute its love you i wanna be with you to i dont feel a conneciton or spark anymore good bye.... the next minute.... just messed up and im really sick of it! i thought it would be easy to move on because i think shes just psycho and bipolar. but its not she was my everyday my every thought for the past 3.5 years. I just dont know what to do anymore i think its really over this time... no more hot and cold but knowing her history i might get a phone call in a month!
Another thing i was unpacking my suitcase and found the ring and necklace i bought her... something shes been wearing for years everyday! dont know what the message of that is, and why she gave them back! very hurtful!
I felt like i needed to save her and i failed.... i showed her the other side, a happy life with no drama (all her life is back home is drama) but she choose to go back! and ive watched her make bad decision after bad decision and its hurtful because im watching someone i love and care about go down the wrong path. People close to me tell me im no longer responsable, if she doesnt want the help and chooses to live without you(me) in her life then so be it! its not up to me to help her anymore! but everyday i wake up and want the girl i meet back and wish i could help her....
I could say so much more but thats just what i can get out of my head right now! Thank you so much to anyone that read this and offers some support and advice!
I made a post here years ago concerning a girl that broke up with me.... well we got back togetehr in the near future but really it was long distance game that was played for 16 months
i dont wanna write a 5000 word essay... nobody will read it so ill try my best keep it brief and hopfully everyone will get an understanding
I was 18 fresh out of high school... never had a girlfriend i went off to University and lived on my own for the first time, I meet my girlfriend on the first day of school. on the bus we compared classes and saw we had one. we began to hang out and as the semester progressed we became best friends. she had a boyfriend the entire time but in a different city, the semester began in September and we fell in love within weeks, just before Christmas she broke up with her boyfriend, i went home to my parents house in a different city for Christmas but then we got together for new years and began our relationship.
We dated for 2 years and in Novemeber she one night said to me that she was going home to her parents house after she was finished school, and she was done in december right before christmas. I was heart broken because i thought she was the one, i thought she was the most beautiful girl in the world and not a day went by that i ever thought differently. long story short she broke up with me and went home to where her parents were and were she grew up. we stayed in contact did tones of talking rollercoaster emotionally.. then she called me one day saying i miss you and i want "us" again. We got back together and then did a long distance relationship for 16 months. Seeing eachother back and forth once a month sometimes less for 4-5 days.(weekends & holidays etc)
Now heres what happend this weekend. Last week she called me one night and said i really miss you and you need to come out and see me, i really want to talk to you about being together and the possibility of me moving out to be with you. so i was like ok............. and went out to see her excited and interested to see if we could finally have a resolution. Well i went out and things went wonderful the first few days and i felt like things were just as new (in love) doing romantic amazing stuff!
THEN BOOM! flipped a switch... sits down with me the night before i leave and "im done" "i cant do long distance anymore" im "emotionally exhausted" and youve been my safety net for the past year..... were going in different directions and were apart.... this needs to end! says to me "i need to figure out me" something i thought i did after i moved away back home here from you.(when we broke up the first time) but ive been lying to myself and trying with every i have to convince myself ive fixed my problems... but i havent and with you in the picture i just can never fix them and all ill do is continue hurting you"
So i was ultimately shocked by this came out of nowhere i realized the long distance was tough but i thought we were managing with a sight of reconnecting sometime in the fall(the idea i thought was going to be presented to me when i travelled out there to see her.
So she cried all night.... and more in the morning..... never in 3.5 years have i see her cry so much yet she broke up with me.... and so i get driven to the airport but her mom she wasnt in any state to drive. I said goodbye and that was that............. i left! im back home and havent made any contact and its been really tough trying to understand what the hell just happend this past weekend!
Get invited out there lovingly and then out of nowhere she just wakes up a different person and thats it! 3.5 years pooof gone and she was the girl i wanted to marry since day 1........... my first my only!
Now i feel lost and just dont know what to do... she made me feel like i existed, had a purpose, the only girl to love me!
I cant understand what just happened, i just dont get it! how someone can go from "come out and see me i want to be with you again(no more longdistance) to goodbye i cant continue hurting you and were done!
I think she is bipolar and its been untreated for a very long time... all throughout the relationship it was hot and cold.... but now it just crossed the line......... 1 minute its love you i wanna be with you to i dont feel a conneciton or spark anymore good bye.... the next minute.... just messed up and im really sick of it! i thought it would be easy to move on because i think shes just psycho and bipolar. but its not she was my everyday my every thought for the past 3.5 years. I just dont know what to do anymore i think its really over this time... no more hot and cold but knowing her history i might get a phone call in a month!
Another thing i was unpacking my suitcase and found the ring and necklace i bought her... something shes been wearing for years everyday! dont know what the message of that is, and why she gave them back! very hurtful!
I felt like i needed to save her and i failed.... i showed her the other side, a happy life with no drama (all her life is back home is drama) but she choose to go back! and ive watched her make bad decision after bad decision and its hurtful because im watching someone i love and care about go down the wrong path. People close to me tell me im no longer responsable, if she doesnt want the help and chooses to live without you(me) in her life then so be it! its not up to me to help her anymore! but everyday i wake up and want the girl i meet back and wish i could help her....
I could say so much more but thats just what i can get out of my head right now! Thank you so much to anyone that read this and offers some support and advice!