coldheart
06-07-2010, 03:37 PM
So me and this girl hit it off hardcore (speaking of meeting parents, wedding, and kids) from the start. She was still living with her husband when we met, but he moved out about a month later. Everything was unimaginably as close to perfect as can get. Great laughs, great conversations, constructive arguments, amazing , complete physical attraction, etc... you name it. Well around week 3 of the husband having moved out, she began acting differently (No more "miss you's, love you's, hearts and love themed-emoticons on text, and a "friendlier" approach over the phone etc...), and with all my relationship red-flag experience, I decided to play along for a bit before jumping into conclusions and potentially over-reacting.
Finally about 2 weeks after the changed behavior I approached her about it, and she explained to me how reality had just hit her hard, and that she saw it very difficult to maintain a relationship while still bearing the cross of a hard separation (regardless of her feelings being over for her husband), having a 2 year old to raise, still unemployed and dealing with the stresses of returning to school. At first it hit me hard, and I reacted defensively by telling her it was over for good and I would never speak to her again (in a polite manner), but then I decided to play the considerate and understanding role, and stick around. She still communicates with me at a friendly level, but I miss her as a GF and our intimacy too.
A buddy of mine suggested I remain her friend so she can have a clear visual of me living my life while still being there (not burning any bridges), although my initial reaction was to be defensive and cut her off completely. I am trying to get over this situation but it's not easy. Me and this girl had an amazing thing going on for it to end this fast. Any suggestions on how to play my cards from here? Thanks to all who read this.
-CH
Finally about 2 weeks after the changed behavior I approached her about it, and she explained to me how reality had just hit her hard, and that she saw it very difficult to maintain a relationship while still bearing the cross of a hard separation (regardless of her feelings being over for her husband), having a 2 year old to raise, still unemployed and dealing with the stresses of returning to school. At first it hit me hard, and I reacted defensively by telling her it was over for good and I would never speak to her again (in a polite manner), but then I decided to play the considerate and understanding role, and stick around. She still communicates with me at a friendly level, but I miss her as a GF and our intimacy too.
A buddy of mine suggested I remain her friend so she can have a clear visual of me living my life while still being there (not burning any bridges), although my initial reaction was to be defensive and cut her off completely. I am trying to get over this situation but it's not easy. Me and this girl had an amazing thing going on for it to end this fast. Any suggestions on how to play my cards from here? Thanks to all who read this.
-CH