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View Full Version : I'm I to blame?? Im confused


Axio
10-18-2010, 12:32 PM
Hello guys, my gf and I have been dating for a yr now and soon to be married in Dec. She is a very good person and is very straight foward, doesn't bullshit around. The one thing that bugs me is that she is very hyper-sensative and can flip that switch and become sort of hateful. Well she can get down right mean and ugly, and then lock herself in the bedroom, most of it to me is kinda silly and I almost wanna tell her to grow up. I learn to pick and choose my battles with her, she very good at arguing and I pretty much give up. Well, and then there is this, I pretty much feel like im sleeping on eggshells with her cuz she turns nasty towards me when i try to touch her or hold her while she sleeps, she tells she can't help and don't even try, so i stop. Well last nite she walked into the bedroom and i had asked if everything was ok, she unloaded on me and me became very nasty, i got upset and slept in the spare bedroom, she tells me she was sleep walking and doesn't recall anything. So i then told her from now on I'm sleeping in the spare bedroom, she got very upset and said if we can't sleep together, we might as well break up, I explanied to her my reason, she pretty much wants to end it now and Im actting foolish. So I then asked her if this is what you want, ill go to the bank and splitt he money tomm and you can have your way, she then got upset because i didn't try and stop her from leaving. Sometimes I feel like my feelings take a back seat and it's all about her emotions. Now what!!!!, do i let her leave or try kiss her ass or is this my fault, please help me!!!:(

smackie9
10-26-2010, 07:09 PM
You got me at eggshells. What you have descided is manic depression. My mother is manic and I know what it's like to live with someone who is. Even with medication you will experience some of those episodes but not as explosive. This is permanent and life long disorder. It's up to you to suggest she get diagnosed if you wish to try and make this work.

Rich
11-16-2010, 12:43 PM
I've lived the "walking on eggshell feelings" with my ex. People are who they are and they won't change (get psychological help) if they don't even feel that they have a problem.

Life isn't happy, rewarding or loving when you're living it on eggshells.

I'd leave her and go on your own. Nothing says that you can't get back together later on if she wakes up, relaizes that she has a problem and gets help for it. If she doesn't, then you don't get back together.

Once you get out from under the heaviness and blackness and see how happy life can be, I doubt that you'd get back with her if she hasn't changed.

There's no light switch that will be flipped and she'll be a totally nother person, so don't hold out hope for that to happen. She is who she is and if it doesn't help you grow, or make you happy and bring positiveness into your life, then why stay? You're here to live your life, not someone elses. Make yourself happy.