Religion in Relationships

[MoonSorrow]

I'm at a lost. I've been dating this guy for more than 5 months, it's pretty serious and tonight he almosts breaks up with me. He's a christian. He feels that he cant be with someone who isnt a christian or cant form a loving relationship with God. ( I am a Christian, but I have problems with God that I've been working on for years) I explained that to him, and we talked and basically, we're still together, only a step back. Meaning, it's more or less a committed friendship at this stage, no (which isn't a problem) and then once I've started to connect with God, our relationship can basically more forward as well. The thing is, he really hurt me by not accepting who I was and he said he's felt this way from the beginning of our relationship. Another thing, I'm not against making my relationship with God better, but I know there are certain things (religion wise) that are bound to come up and disagree over. (i.e. he thinks all other religions have it wrong and because they dont know and accept the love of Christ then they're going to hell; which I dont believe at all.)
Has anyone else here ever had problems with dating someone who's religion got in the way? How do I go about this? Any and all advise would be appreciated, cause really, I'm at a lost at the moment.
:confused:

[eightball61]

He feels that he cant be with someone who isnt a christian or cant form a loving relationship with God.


He shouldn't have gotten into a relationship without knowing any better about his partner. It is his mistake and you are now paying for it. Getting into a relationship does not patch problems and he should have used his common sense to that. You need to decide what more important to you and then you need to let him know that. If he can't accept who you are as a person then he needs to be with someone thats more into his religion so he doesn't run into this problem again.

[Rich]

Religion and politics. The two great trouble makers.

It truly is amazing how most religions boast of worshiping a God that's all loving, forgiving and accepting, but yet most religions ostracize, castigate, exclude and look down upon anyone that doesn't agree with their belief system. So much for accepting.

I guess only their God is loving, accepting and forgiving, but not them.

Too bad most religions don't take the view that, "ours isn't the only way to God. It's just another way." If most religions did that, then the world would be a better place.

In response to your post, I feel that your BF is too much of a religious zealot to consistently accept your differing views. That you will always have disagreements.

One can see by what you write that your BF thinks that he's better than you and that he somewhat looks down upon you.

That's not equality in a relationship, which is a big requirement to making a relationship work.

IMO, unless your Bf tempers his religious views (which is doubtful) and sees the light, sort of speak, then I don't see this working out. Your BF should go seek another bible thumper to be with.

His holier than thou attitude doesn't bode well for a long lasting and happy relationship with your views.

[Diablo]

Thou shalt skeedaddle. Drop this guy like a hot potato. His attitude sucks.

[Kilaria]

I had the same problem as you. but mine is a little bit more extreme, since my boyfriend was christian at the time (a preachers son actually) and i hid from him that i leaned more towards an independant or, if you must label it, pagan spirituality.

Slowly it began to come out. And one night, he just flipped over it. It was around the 1 year mark of our relationship.

It was hard, and it took a long time, but eventually he learned to accept it. He does not beleive what i beleive, but he knows it's who i am.

kilaria