Ah my head is going to explode!!!

[catface]

SO heres the deal. I've been with my boyfriend for 2 and a half years but have been quite unhappy for nearly a year now. I've always chosen to work at the relationship whenever problems arise because I thought he was worth fighting for, but now things have changed. Firstly I've fallen in love with one of my best friends. I live with him and see him every day and its becoming very difficult. He is also good friends with my boyfriend. I know he only see's me as a friend so that is not an issue, but i cant forget about these developing feelings. I feel suffocated in my relationship but I just can't bring myself to break his heart as well as disrupting his relationships with my frineds. I usually have friends to support me but they have all left. The only friend i have to confide in is the one who i have feeling for. my boyfriend is going travelling for 2 months round europe and i can't decide whther its fair to break it off with him before he goes or leave it till when he comes back. I need to talk to someone about it, should i confide in the friend just leaving out the part about me being in love with him? Any advise would be greatly appreciated. :confused:

[eightball61]

Do you feel that you may cheat on him while he is gone?

[catface]

I do not want to cheat on him. But i know I will feel more free and liberated when he's gone. will i really want to go back to being in this relationship that is making me feel so trapped when he gets back?

[eightball61]

Since you couldn't supply a direct answer to that question then I believe it would be safe to say "it's better off you end the relationship". Right now its not fair to him that you are having these feelings for someone else and when he's gone it would be even worse if you cheated.

If you ended things then that would enable you to clear your mind a bit. The other dilemma is his best friend. You don't want to come in the way of a friendship if things don't work out for you both.

I think the only true way for you to seperate these feelings would be to move out of that house. If you have the right funding then go search for an apartment to be alone or find another roomate that "is" female.

You need to decide first what you want out of this relationship? do you want to continue it? If you do then you need to move out.....

If you feel that you need to move on to situate your feelings then end the relationship but also still move out so you don't come in-between "thier" friendship....

I think its safe to say that you need to move out in order to settle your thoughts & feelings.

[bdtraders]

maybe its just me and i could be wrong but maybe you devoloped "feelings" for this friend cause he just talks to you, and you lack that with your BF.
are you feelings really true for your friend or are they just a result of your disatisfaction in your current relationship and your friend happens to lend his ear (as any guy will do) and since you lack that in your current disfunctional relationship you have fallen for the guy that you share the most with, a home and conversation.

my bet is if you broke up with your boyfriend and started seeing your friend it wouldnt be as good as you think it might be because yes he will let you lean on him now, but like you stated he may not be interested.

Its sounds like yoy need to cut loose your boyfriend cause you dont care for him anymore, but i wouldnt persue a relationship with your roommate because you need time to regather yourself and your thoughts and emotions. hes just an ear right now and because your sad in your current relation it is warming your heart, but that to will die in time.

Sorry just my honest opinion, and my experience.

[Rich]

Obviously you can't see yourself marrying and spending the rest of your life with your BF, so break it off with him.

Maybe the only reason your roomate only sees you as a friend is because you're dating his friend. Who knows, maybe breaking up with you BF will embolden your roomate to look at you in a different light.

When it comes to the questions as to why you broke up with your BF, jsut tell people the truth. That you did not see yourself marrying this person and you wanted to move on to possibly meet that person.

I wouldn't tell your roomate just yet your feelings for him. See what develops between you two after you break up. If after awhile nothing....then put some moves on your roomate.

Definately break up with your BF before his trip.

[Rich]

Obviously you can't see yourself marrying and spending the rest of your life with your BF, so break it off with him.

Maybe the only reason your roomate only sees you as a friend is because you're dating his friend. Who knows, maybe breaking up with you BF will embolden your roomate to look at you in a different light.

When it comes to the questions as to why you broke up with your BF, just tell people the truth. That you did not see yourself marrying this person and you wanted to move on to possibly meet that person.

I wouldn't tell your roomate just yet your feelings for him. See what develops between you two after you break up. If after awhile nothing....then put some moves on your roomate.

Definately break up with your BF before his trip.