Wendy
12-15-2010, 05:29 AM
I really need help. My OH and I have been dealing with this issue for a long time now, and it really is the only issue that we have as a couple right now. I need to know if I'm overreacting or if I'm justified in my feelings. Some responses from both male and female would be greatly appreciated.
Okay so my BF likes to go online, pretend to be this girl he's created using photos of someone on his Facebook friends list, and chat live with men while role playing with this "character" while they both get off. He claims it's not homoual at all, and that he just enjoys the idea of controlling what this girl does.
Here's the problem: I can't stand the idea of him doing this! The worst is when he and I haven't been ual in a week or so (I have a higher drive than he does and want it WAY more often) and he does this online thing instead of me! We have great and he says that this online thing is no threat to me and has nothing to do with me, but what am I to think when I'm already not getting it as often as I'd like, and he'd rather be doing THAT!?
We live together in a small condo so it's ridiculously obvious when he takes his laptop in the bedroom all sneaky-like to do it. He's lied to me about it and although we've tried to come to a compromise he never sticks with the compromise and just does it whenever anyways. So I feel like I'm not being heard and that no matter what my feelings are in the matter, he's just going to do whatever he wants anyway.
Now, I'm pregnant, and the thought of him going to do this online thing freaks me out even more. I gave up smoking (and a lot more!) to be with him and it seems like he's not willing to give this one thing up for me.
Am I overreacting? It's the only thing that makes him lie to me and while I want him to be happy, I have my own needs too y'know? I feel neglected when he goes and does this, especially if it's been a while, and in a weird way it almost feels like he's cheating on me because he acts so sneaky about it.
I thought maybe while he was doing that, I'd go online and chat ually with people but I'm just not that type I guess. I have no desire and just prefer the real thing, which I can't get when he's in the other room cyber-boinking.
I'm at my wits end with this, and could REALLY use some solid male and female advice! Have any of you been in a similar situation? How did you work it out?
Okay so my BF likes to go online, pretend to be this girl he's created using photos of someone on his Facebook friends list, and chat live with men while role playing with this "character" while they both get off. He claims it's not homoual at all, and that he just enjoys the idea of controlling what this girl does.
Here's the problem: I can't stand the idea of him doing this! The worst is when he and I haven't been ual in a week or so (I have a higher drive than he does and want it WAY more often) and he does this online thing instead of me! We have great and he says that this online thing is no threat to me and has nothing to do with me, but what am I to think when I'm already not getting it as often as I'd like, and he'd rather be doing THAT!?
We live together in a small condo so it's ridiculously obvious when he takes his laptop in the bedroom all sneaky-like to do it. He's lied to me about it and although we've tried to come to a compromise he never sticks with the compromise and just does it whenever anyways. So I feel like I'm not being heard and that no matter what my feelings are in the matter, he's just going to do whatever he wants anyway.
Now, I'm pregnant, and the thought of him going to do this online thing freaks me out even more. I gave up smoking (and a lot more!) to be with him and it seems like he's not willing to give this one thing up for me.
Am I overreacting? It's the only thing that makes him lie to me and while I want him to be happy, I have my own needs too y'know? I feel neglected when he goes and does this, especially if it's been a while, and in a weird way it almost feels like he's cheating on me because he acts so sneaky about it.
I thought maybe while he was doing that, I'd go online and chat ually with people but I'm just not that type I guess. I have no desire and just prefer the real thing, which I can't get when he's in the other room cyber-boinking.
I'm at my wits end with this, and could REALLY use some solid male and female advice! Have any of you been in a similar situation? How did you work it out?