I wish she was mine [Archive] - Relationship Forums

sting2289

06-03-2005, 11:38 PM

Theres this girl i met her name is aimee.. i really realy like her and she likes me.. but she has a boyfreind.. but she and i have been doing stuff.. like holding hands and.. ive been giving her backrubs that lead to other things.. but she has a boyfreind and i dont want to share her with him.. but i dont know what to do i dont want to give her an altimatum. and her never want to talk to me again but i dont wanna continue with hiding my feelings for her.. im just soo lost.. :confused:

Diablo

06-04-2005, 02:44 AM

You either have to accept things the way they are or find someone new. Aimee has a boyfriend that you know of and there could be others. You can't monopolize a girl like that.

eightball61

06-04-2005, 04:36 AM

Your probably giving the attention that her boyfriend is not giving her. If you don't want to share then you need to tell her that. You need tell her your feelings during this talk and also add this is the reason why you need to leave what has been going on. Doing it this way will allow you to get your feelings out and not share her with him at the same time. If she came back to you then you know it was meant to be.

Goodluck

sting2289

06-04-2005, 02:37 PM

thanks im just sooo confused.. about the whole thing i mean she is a nice girl and she told me she cares about us both.. but i dont want to have to share her.with anyone. but i really want to be with her but i dont know how to tell her i want "us" meaning me and her and not him

eightball61

06-04-2005, 04:02 PM

You can't have the best of both worlds. She is dating someone else and the only way you will have her without sharing is "if" she was to breakup with him. Right now, you can't count on that because she is still with him. All you can do at this point is break yourself away from the situation. When you do break yourself away mention your feelings to her and tell her you can't go on having a friendship like this while she is with someone else.

Howard

06-04-2005, 06:49 PM

Well,She's dating somebody and she has a boyfriend so is it possible that you 2 can just stay friends? :confused:

sting2289

06-05-2005, 02:03 AM

we could but i really wanna be more than freinds.. i mean .. we talk all the time.. i buy her roses all the time.. i dont want to be a fill in for what her boyfreind cant give her.. but.. i dont wanan step away either.. i really want to be with her. and .. i mean she talks about stuff with me more than she talks to her boyfreind she tells me stuff she doesnt tell him. im just soo confused..

eightball61

06-05-2005, 05:51 AM

As I stated before, you can't have the best of both worlds. Right now you can't have her like you want her so that leaves you to make a decision. I know you are confused but you need to make a strong decision and stick to it. By continuing what you are doing is allowing yourself to be confused about the situation. If you want this confusion to stop then you need to make a final decision on what you want.

sting2289

06-05-2005, 03:10 PM

this is where im haveing the trouble what do i say? or what do i do.. do i step away .. and wait.. or..do i ask her to breakup with him this is where i am confused

eightball61

06-05-2005, 03:50 PM

Below is my first response to you. All of your questions that you asked in you last post are answered in this quote. The only thing that is not answered is you shouldn't ask her to breakup with him.....That is her decision and you want her to make that decision. You don't want to enter a relationship with her while she still has feelings for him.

Your probably giving the attention that her boyfriend is not giving her. If you don't want to share then you need to tell her that. You need tell her your feelings during this talk and also add this is the reason why you need to leave what has been going on. Doing it this way will allow you to get your feelings out and not share her with him at the same time. If she came back to you then you know it was meant to be.

Goodluck

sting2289

06-05-2005, 04:20 PM

i'll try. but its going to be hard

eightball61

06-05-2005, 08:58 PM

i'll try. but its going to be hard

Sounds like a plan......

It'd hard to deal with change but change can be beneficial.

Gooduck:)

sting2289

06-05-2005, 09:00 PM

ok so runing back through this.. tell her how i feel take a step back and not do stuff with her then ask her too.. be with me... i think thats what your saying.. hopefully lol. :eek: i just hope i dont fek up

eightball61

06-05-2005, 09:59 PM

Again, you need to seperate yourself from the situation. You can tell her your feeling at the same time but you need to back off so she can figure out her own relationship. The longer you stall the harder it will be for you. You need to do what you think is right but if you want the confusion to stop then you must move on.

Howard

06-06-2005, 10:03 PM

This is going to be a tough situation here.You want to be more than just friends but she already has a boyfriend?That's going to be a tough one to call. :confused:

sting2289

06-15-2005, 03:27 PM

i couldnt do it.. i couldnt step away.. we stepped foward in our relationship tho.. and she still has a boyfriend ... im soo confused.. i told her my feelings.. and we just talked about how we felt for like 6 hours.. i dont want to step away from her.. not now anyway.. i mean i cant .. it wouldnt be right.. i dont know what to do

eightball61

06-15-2005, 03:35 PM

If you can't step away then go with it. :rolleyes:

I can't offer you advice to a situation like this is if you can't pull yourself away. She has a BF & they are not going to breakup. The breakup would have already happened if they were going to. You are setting yourself up for future hurt and the only way you will learn is experiencing it. We tried to help you pull away but you can't.....this is your choice.

sting2289

06-15-2005, 03:45 PM

she told me she's pregnant.. and i was her first... and trust me i was.... i cant step away now.. i cant do it...and i dont beleive in abortions

eightball61

06-15-2005, 03:54 PM

Ok then.....

You will not know for sure if that child is yours until the proper test can prove that. If she feels your the father then she needs to end her current relationship and start focusing on being a parent.....It's your call but I do wish you luck.

sting2289

06-15-2005, 03:57 PM

thanks im gonna need it

eightball61

06-15-2005, 04:06 PM

thanks im gonna need it

Please keep us posted periodically :)

SALly

06-15-2005, 04:17 PM

I can't imagine that her "boyfriend" would stay with her knowing she is pregnant with another guy's child. I don't mean to sound motherly---but OMG why wouldn't you use protection?????!!!!!! She needs to talk to both of you about what is going on and what needs to happen. I hope she isn't telling both of you that you are the father. The poor child will be totally caught up in the middle. One of you needs to step up and be the responsible one now and get some plans in order. A baby isn't just some minor thing.....this baby will change all of your lives FOREVER!!

sting2289

06-15-2005, 05:15 PM

i know this we did use protection.. but.. it broke.. and i felt soo bad and i will step up and be the responsible one. i have a little brother and sister he is 4 she is 2 and i dont want kids right now .. and she doesnt look pregnant. her period skipped and she went and got the test.. and now come to find out she is pregnant

sting2289

06-15-2005, 05:17 PM

by the way i am ready to tell you my age and i know i am going to get scolded for thjis one..

im 15..

eightball61

06-15-2005, 05:35 PM

im 15..

WOW......Her parents are going to castrate you.

You need to know if this child is 100% yours then you need to start taking responsibility. You both need to have a solid talk along with her parents and yours about this situation. If that child is yours then you both will need to take a step up to life and act as parents. I prey youboth have support from the both of your parents for help but that is unknown at this time. You both need to gain responsibility together and come up with a plan to work something out.

sting2289

06-15-2005, 05:48 PM

I havent told my parents.. and i have a fear that if her dad cuts my balls off then my mother will cut my off.. i will try to step up and be the best parent i can .. i started work wednesday when i found out i went to a junkyard and worked for eight hours makeing 12$ an hour and i am going to go there everyday.. i have about 300$ in the bank right now saved up.. so im trying to prepare

eightball61

06-15-2005, 05:53 PM

You both need to have your parents evolved also. Keeping a secret will not help the situation.

SALly

06-15-2005, 06:20 PM

There is always abortion.... I know- that's terrible to say.....or adoption.
Are you sure she is, did you see the test? You NEED to let your parents know when you know for sure. You will NEED their help, you can't do this on your own--- no matter how hard you try.

eightball61

06-15-2005, 06:40 PM

Since you are against abortion then I agree with Sally and you do have adoption as an alternative. If you don't have the support from both of your parents then you may need to seek this your for your child to grow up in a good home. In order to make this decision though you need to make it known to your parents on what's going on.

sting2289

06-15-2005, 06:43 PM

SALly

06-15-2005, 06:44 PM

What does the girl think of all this? Is she happy about being pregnant? What does she want to do?

sting2289

06-15-2005, 06:47 PM

she doesnt want an abortion just like i dont but neither of us are ready for a kid.. and .. i need to bring to her the subject of adoption

SALly

06-15-2005, 06:49 PM

Thanks for all the help guys.. no i didnt see the test.. but i beleive her.. and.. if worse comes to worse.. then abortion is opptional .. but i think adoption would be better.. someone who can provide a home for my kid would be the best.. hell i would even pay child support to the foster parents
Yeah you probably would do that for a while (pay child support) and it would fun..... but what about in 10 years when you want a nice car, and a house, and you want to get a good education...... I don't want to scare you but this father thing...it isn't just for a little while. It's forever.... How can you possibly be a good father at 15 without the help of parents or other adults.

SALly

06-15-2005, 06:50 PM

How old is she?

sting2289

06-15-2005, 06:53 PM

16..her birthday is in april

eightball61

06-15-2005, 06:56 PM

How can you possibly be a good father at 15 without the help of parents or other adults.

I agree with this & this is why I have stated to you numorous times that you need to make this known to both of your parents....Please don't stall this process and let us know what happens.

SALly

06-15-2005, 06:56 PM

Wow- this hits close to home for me..... I got pregnant when I was 16, too. The guy supposedly pulled out but --- I guess not!!!

sting2289

06-15-2005, 06:57 PM

i will.. but if i dont come back it will tell you that my mom has killed me..

eightball61

06-15-2005, 06:57 PM

16..her birthday is in april

next april or this past april?

sting2289

06-15-2005, 06:58 PM

she is 16 now.. and she will be 17 in april.. i am 15 my birthday is in august

eightball61

06-15-2005, 06:58 PM

i will.. but if i dont come back it will tell you that my mom has killed me..

Her mom will understand that it takes two people to make a baby.

sting2289

06-15-2005, 06:59 PM

her mom is nice.. picture my mom as a female version of the hulk

SALly

06-15-2005, 07:00 PM

Goodluck man!!!

sting2289

06-15-2005, 07:02 PM

send flowers to my funeral lol.. i nkow this is notime for jokes but lol.. its all i got b4 i die lol..

eightball61

06-15-2005, 07:11 PM

You are in an adult situation so your approach will need to be adult like. Keep sturdy and create a game plan with her so you can discuss your thoughts with your parents.