creebee
07-12-2005, 05:30 PM
Hi,
My fiance and I have been dating for 1 1/2 years, and have been engaged for about 8 months. We moved in 6 months ago. We were going to plan the wedding in another country and went down there (3 months ago) with her parents. Things between us then was a little shaky (we seemed to have been getting on each other's nerves). At the trip her mom metioned how her brother is doing WAY too much for his own kids and was very critical of how he is raising his family. She also thinks that we should name our first boy after my fiance's maiden name. ON the trip home I mentioned how I was scared to have a critical mother in law. This prompted a HUGE fight and she moved out. She came back a month later, after we had talked about a lot of things. We also cancelled the engagement party we had setup and decided to just take our time.
about a week ago, I woke up in abad mood and she new something was wrong. I told her that I was unhappy with our life. She said, "I knew it!" I also said this is the 4th time I have brought this up. Then she told me how we have not been getting along at all since our trip to plan our wedding. I was floored as I thought things were fine. Of course we had some arguments and what have you, but that's what goes along with living with someone. Nothing too crazy. But she also had been at her parent's place for 2 weeks before we had this discussion about us and our life. We fought so hard that we almost ended it.
She then left to go to her parents (which she was doing anyways) and called me ten minutes later to tell me she loves me, that she is NOT leaving me, and that she wanted to turn the car around and come back because hse thought this was crazy. She also made it clear that this was about her, not about me. And I understood. She felt like she was not putting enough into the relationship and that she is also scared to get married. I told her not once have I brought up our marriage, our wedding...anything like that becuase I felt we were still getting to know each other while living together.
I just don't know what to do our think. Any thoughts?
My fiance and I have been dating for 1 1/2 years, and have been engaged for about 8 months. We moved in 6 months ago. We were going to plan the wedding in another country and went down there (3 months ago) with her parents. Things between us then was a little shaky (we seemed to have been getting on each other's nerves). At the trip her mom metioned how her brother is doing WAY too much for his own kids and was very critical of how he is raising his family. She also thinks that we should name our first boy after my fiance's maiden name. ON the trip home I mentioned how I was scared to have a critical mother in law. This prompted a HUGE fight and she moved out. She came back a month later, after we had talked about a lot of things. We also cancelled the engagement party we had setup and decided to just take our time.
about a week ago, I woke up in abad mood and she new something was wrong. I told her that I was unhappy with our life. She said, "I knew it!" I also said this is the 4th time I have brought this up. Then she told me how we have not been getting along at all since our trip to plan our wedding. I was floored as I thought things were fine. Of course we had some arguments and what have you, but that's what goes along with living with someone. Nothing too crazy. But she also had been at her parent's place for 2 weeks before we had this discussion about us and our life. We fought so hard that we almost ended it.
She then left to go to her parents (which she was doing anyways) and called me ten minutes later to tell me she loves me, that she is NOT leaving me, and that she wanted to turn the car around and come back because hse thought this was crazy. She also made it clear that this was about her, not about me. And I understood. She felt like she was not putting enough into the relationship and that she is also scared to get married. I told her not once have I brought up our marriage, our wedding...anything like that becuase I felt we were still getting to know each other while living together.
I just don't know what to do our think. Any thoughts?